Page 73 of Badd B*tch

"Hurts?"

He nodded. "It does now, yeah." He rumbled a quiet laugh. "Not a word. It was worth it. More than worth it." A long pause. "Now if only I could return the favor without excruciating agony."

"I don't need that, Jax," I whispered. "That isn't why I did it."

"I want to." His voice was quiet but intense. "I need to know what you taste like. I need to know what you sound like when I make you come."

I didn't know how to tell him that I'd always had a weird hang-up about receiving oral. I tried, but the words dried up on my tongue. Frustrated, I groaned again, burying my face in his chest once more.

“What?" he asked, laughing. "What now?"

"I'm a mess, Jax, that's what."

"Meaning?"

"It's embarrassing," I muttered.

"No, it's not. Remember? We just talked about this." He tilted my face up so I looked up at him, and I saw nothing in his eyes but sympathy, compassion, and understanding. "I want to know everything about you."

"I'm just…" I covered my face in my hands, groaning in frustration again. "I liked that, Jax. Doing that for you—giving that to you. It was hot. And I promise you, I fucking promise I'm not bullshitting you when I say I will happily and eagerly do it all the time." I held his eyes. "I like how you taste. I like how you feel. I love the noises you make. All of it. And I think I know you well enough to know that you'd never ask me to go down on you—"

"No, never."

"But I want you to. I want you to ask so I can show you how much I like doing it."

"But?"

"It's always been hard for me to receive it. I get… uncomfortable. I dunno. I get in my head about it. Embarrassed, I guess? And it's at least partially because no one I've ever been with has wanted to…to do that. To me. For me. Whatever."

"What about—"

I couldn’t handle hearing his name at the moment, so I interrupted. "Our whole relationship from day one was against regs, and if we were discovered by someone not as willing to look the other way, we faced demotion, if not court-martial. So we didn't exactly have a lot of time or privacy, let alone much by way of horizontal surfaces for that kind of activity."

Jax's grin was hot. "Oh, honey. I don't need you horizontal to eat your pussy until you come so hard you don’t know which way is up."

My heart stuttered, my gut flipped, and my pussy gushed heat, dripped desire. “Jax,” I groaned, and then whimpered. "Stop. God."

He put his lips to my ear. "You want that, don't you?"

"I…I don't know," I breathed.

"Lies."

"I don't know!” I protested. "It sounds nice, though."

He paused. "Wait. Have you never…?"

I rolled a shoulder, self-conscious. "No. I mean, it's been tried a couple of times. But as I said, I get all in my head about it. I'm a chronic overthinker."

He sighed, cradled me to himself again—and the way he held me, as if I was the most precious thing in the world, had my throat burning and my eyes burning and my gut burning. "Well, if you don't like it, then you don't like it. But I'd like to try."

"I'll let you." I touched his chest when he started to move. "After you've healed a bit."

He slumped, groaning. "Fuck. I can't wait that long."

I rested my chin on the firm support of his pec, frowning up at him. "You really…like…doing that?"

He nodded, humming an affirmative. "Mmm-hmm. A fucking lot, babe. Not that weird. You just got finished saying how much you liked going down on me, right? Well, same applies to me."