Page 88 of Sunny Undone

“Oh.”

“You’re not a hard no on all this, right?” The words escape his lips. “This is about working you and me out, not you leaving?”

“I wouldn’t be here, and Lord knows I wouldn’t have spent the last twenty-fours grappling with it, if I were a hard no.”

“Then, trust me. For now, at least. I know your brain is on a constant quest for answers. I know you need you and me and what I do tucked neatly into a column. But I think the best way for us to figure this out is just to live in it. It’s gonna be messy, but life is.”

“My whole life is about making sense of the world. I really like you, Sunny. What happens if, when I make sense of this, we don’t add up because this scares me?”

He cups my cheek. “We’re going to, Della. I have a feeling.”

Something deep and warm blooms in my chest at his words, because I want to cling to that feeling with him.

“I want to believe you. Badly, if I’m honest. In fact, it scares me how much I want to.”

Sunny smiles softly. “You know, it’s easy for me. I rely on my gut, on my instinct, for most things, because, let’s face it, my brain’s not that good at shit.”

“Stop putting yourself down like that. Your brain works just fine. I don’t know why you started to believe it doesn’t. I saw all those science-fiction books you clearly love reading. They take some comprehending. So, I don’t know why you let your biker-friends make fun of you for being less academically inclined. They’re not just being unfair, they’re wrong.”

He pulls my lips to his and kisses me tenderly. “Not sure anybody has ever seen me quite like you do.”

“Well, no one has ever had my back like you do. Or made me laugh like you do.”

“Or fucked you like I do?”

I can’t help but smile. “Yes, Sunny. No one has ever done that either.”

“My cock is happy to hear that. But where I was going with this, is that, somewhere along the line, your brain became the only thing you listen to. And our future is gonna need you to make some decisions using your gut instinct and your heart.”

27

SUNNY

Iwake, first, and despite the fact we fucked like rabbits on the dock, and then again when we got home last night, my cock aches for more of Della. She lies curled up in front of me, that delicious ass of hers pressed up against my stiff length.

My nose is buried in her hair, my hand cupping her tit.

She sighs, but not wakefully. Like she’s settling into a dream or something. There’s something about a sleeping Della that gets me right in the fucking chest. Because awake Della is always doing something. Thinking. Assimilating. But this Della trusts me.

Trusts me enough to switch off and let go and simply rest.

And then, I remember what she said to me up against that tree. About free use. About how much she loved it when my cock slipped inside her. And how, while she wants that feeling, she doesn’t want that reality of being unprotected. The way she went pink when I asked her if a role-play would do it. Waking her. Fucking her. Pretending I was bare and that she hadn’t consented.

I’m not sure she understands what that kind of trust does to a man like me. That she trusts me with her body when she’s at her most vulnerable.

I slip from behind her as gently as I can and wince when the bedside table drawer creaks as I open it in the half-light. Quietly, I fish around and pull out a condom, rip the packet with my teeth, and roll it on. Then, I apply a healthy amount of lube, because, while I don’t want to wake her to get her wet, I don’t want this to hurt.

Then, as smoothly as I can, I slip back behind her, slide my leg between her thighs to open her to me a little, and line my cock up with her entrance.

At first, I rub it around a little, just so the lube can do its thing, and then, I slip just the tip in. Just an inch.

And fuck, if it doesn’t play with my mind that I’m doing something illicit. She’s asleep, not consenting. Even though, deep down, I know she wants this as much as I do.

But if I go too fast, too deep, too soon, there’s a solid chance I’ll wake her.

It takes every bit of control I have to not push forward, to just let her squeeze and warm the tip of my cock.

I work hard to control my breath as my heart rate increases, a loud whoosh in my ears as blood diverts from everywhere in my body. I withdraw just a fraction, then ease back in a little tighter, and my hand slips to her hip, about to squeeze it, before I catch myself.