Page 64 of Ashborne Phoenix

I stared up at him and I loved him… and my heart swung wildly between hurt, because I remembered the confusion and self-loathing I’d felt at that time, and sheer joy because… look how far we’d come.

“Grace… I am so sorry.”

“I know! You already told me—”

“I didn’t. Not enough. When we got back to the Keep and Donavyn took me away, I saw that I was wrong. He and Kham helped me see. But there was no chance to tell you because Breckon arrived. And since, I’ve been so desperate to find you and get you back, I didn’t even think—but I’m thinking now. And I want you to be certain that I understand. I know shame. I know rejection. I know how it feels to love someone and have them shove your offering right back in your face. I wish I’d never done that to you. I wish I’d had half your courage in those days. Grace… God, I’m sorry.”

And then, to my horror, he dropped to his knees in front of me.

For a split second I was reminded of a different night. A different fear.

Kneeling naked on the rough floor of that hut, so in love, but bared to him as he stared. Confused. Insecure.

I opened my mouth, grabbed his hands, started to pull him back to his feet, but he shook his head and gripped my hands, forcing me to remain in front of him, over him, his eyes blazing with intensity.

“Voski, this isn’t necessary. This isn’t how we have to—”

“Yes, it is,” he said hoarsely. “Please, Grace. Let me say this.” And there was pleading in his eyes, and in his tone and it stopped my protests.

He humbled himself. He wished to bare his most tender heart. And I made him fight for it?

I froze, then took a deep breath and nodded. “I’m listening.”

He didn’t smile. Didn’t frown. Just stared at me, brows drawn down, as if he’d never truly seen me before.

“I was so frightened, Grace,” he breathed. “It’s not an excuse. It’s just the simple truth. I was blinded by fear. I still am, at times. Kham helps. But I want you to know: I didn’t see you clearly. I didn’t understand what I was doing then. I do now. And it horrifies me. Do you believe me?”

I nodded. I wanted to speak, but my throat was closing at the sight of him before me with such humility—and love. The bond sang with it, a full-throated roar of love that made my heart pound.

“I understand now, Grace,” he whispered, shaking his head. “I rejected you when you laid claim to me. I rebuffed your efforts to complete the bond. The… the gift you offered of your heart. Unconditionally. I wouldn’t let myself believe it, even when you proved true. The most precious thing I’ve ever been offered, and I fought it. I fought you. Can you forgive me?”

“Of course I do!” I choked, tears spilling over my lashes. “Voski, this isn’t necessary—”

“It is. Because you are so full of grace.” It was his first smile. Hesitant. Wavering. Gone in a blink. But I’d seen it—and felt it blaze through our link. “I’ve said I don’t deserve you, and it’s insanely true. I know that. I knew that. But being here… I see it again. I’m ashamed of how I treated you—rejecting you, lashing out, making you feel small. God, Grace, if anyone else spoke to you that way now, I would kill them.”

I gave a huff of laughter, but he didn’t smile. His brows drew down.

“All that ridiculousness about not telling the brothers… it seems so petty now. I was an idiot. I’m sorry it took another man tearing you out of my grasp, and putting you through all of this to wake me up, but I have, Grace. I’m awake. My eyes are wide open. I see you. I know you.” He released one of my hands to tap his chest. “I love you, Grace. I’m begging you to forget the ways I behaved. To never look back on those hours, ever again. Don’t let those questions play in your mind—or if they do, come to me. Tell me. I will tell you the truth over, and over, and over until you never fear it again. I love you, Grace. I love you more than my own life. I will never denigrate or… or belittle you like that again. And I will never allow any other person to do so, either.

“If I achieve nothing else in this lifetime, I will die happy if I can prove to you that of all my life’s regrets, hurting you is the one that cuts the deepest.”

“Oh, Voski,” I choked, but he plowed on.

“When this is over, when we’ve beaten these bastards, and we go home, I will never deny you. I will never hide you. I am proud to be your mate—and so, so proud of you. My love, you are… magnificent. And I don’t deserve you. But I will spend the rest of my days doing my best to change that.”

I sobbed and threw my arms around his neck. But I couldn’t stand looking down on him, so I dropped into the circle of his arms, throwing myself into his chest, weeping.

“Stop. Please, stop. I know you love me,” I gasped, pulling him down. “I don’t want to look back. I just want to look ahead. I just want you with me.”

He’d tipped his chin down to keep our eyes locked, and finally, the corners of his mouth curled up. “You’ll have me. Forever, Grace. I remember your words—so it’s my turn.”

“What—”

“Mine,” he whispered, then kissed me. “You… are… mine. And I will fight to the death anyone who says otherwise. But perhaps more importantly… I am yours. Forever. Unequivocally. To my soul.”

I sobbed and laughed in the same breath as my heart swelled. “I love you, too,” I said hoarsely. “And I always will.”

His smile grew. “I know.”