Page 4 of Blinding Lights

“Fuuck. I get it, I do. I messed up. But I can’t change the past.”

My body shudders as a blanket of resolve coats me. We can argue about this all day, but he has rights, and I’d rather work it out amicably. “Okay.”

“Okay?” His voice lifts and I hate that he's got me.

“It will take time for me to trust you completely, but I’m willing to work with you. I’m sure we can come up with a plan that suits everyone.”

“Thanks, Lily.”

“Don’t thank me. Convince me that I made the right choice.”

Travis thanks me again anyway, chuckling as he says goodbye, and I drop the phone just as Ava’s voice filters in from her room.

She’s awake.

I listen for a moment as she sings to herself, or her toys, and I can’t stop the smile that spreads across my face.

She deserves the chance to get to know Travis properly. I just have to hope he doesn’t let her down more than he already has.

I have to learn to trust him again.

For Ava’s sake and mine.

HALLOWEEN

Chapter One

LILY

PRESENT DAY

“I have nothing to wear, Hen.” I adjust my earbuds as I glare down at my phone on the bed, as though my best friend and business partner is actually there. “We knew about Hunter and Olivia’s party months ago. Why didn’t I go shopping?”

Leaning back against the soft yellow wall of my bedroom, I shift my gaze past the window and my garden sanctuary outside to instead stare at my closet, hoping that if I focus all my energy there, by some miracle, everything I need will magically appear.

Our friends, Shawn—otherwise known as Hunter—and Olivia, finally got engaged last year after dating since high school. They wanted to travel and build their careers before tying the knot, and now that the time is right, they’re all in. No expense spared.

Instead of celebrating in New Orleans, where most of us live, they’ve planned a huge Vegas weekend, a Halloween event—costumes expected— brunches, lunches, pool parties, extravagant dinners, expensive hotels. You name it, they’ve organized it all. And that’s just the bachelor/bachelorette party. The wedding is even bigger.

After meeting Olivia a couple of years ago, we had an instant connection. And despite not growing up with the group like the rest of the wedding party, I’ve become quite close to Hunter too. I’m excited for the weekend, but also a little overwhelmed. Other than a few birthdays and a handful of dates, I haven’t been out in years. Not since before Ava was born.

“Shopping? With what time, Lil?” Henley’s voice softens, her tone sympathetic. “Don’t be so hard on yourself. I’m sure you have more options than you think.”

I bite back a laugh as a grin lights up my face.

“Really? That’s how you’re choosing to respond to that?” I’ll bet she’s dying to say, “I told you so.”

Henley and I have been friends since our first day of college. I was a serious homebody, living away from my family for the first time, and Henley quickly became my rock. It didn’t take long for us to realize we were soul mates, and when college ended, I stayed. She’s the sibling I never had. The sister I never had. And she takes that job incredibly seriously—usually calling me out on my shit.

“Okay, fine. I was going to go easy on you since you’ve been through all the emotions today. But…how many times did I offer to come with you?”

“More than I can count.” I cringe even though she can’t see me, and while a laugh finally escapes me, I’m still hit with a pang of regret. I love clothes and looking nice, but I have never found joy in the actual buying process. I ordered my costume for the Halloween party online in two different sizes and tried them on at home. I guess I could have done that with other outfits too, but even that seemed like too much effort.

“I need a personal shopper. One of those people that’ll measure me and fill my closet with everything I need.”

“That sounds amazing. I wonder if I can ask Beckett to give me that for Christmas. If he says yes, I’ll share it with you.”

“Aren’t our first class flights to Vegas your Christmas present?”