Page 86 of The Secret Sister

He nodded.

She forced herself to ask the question leaping about her head. ‘Did you love her very much?’

At this, he turned and looked directly at her. ‘I thought I did. Just as I thought she loved me. She told me often enough that she did.’

‘I’m sorry,’ Eliza murmured.

‘Juliana threw me over, told anyone who would listen that I was dull, which in fairness was probably true. After that I was away in Argentina, and the fighting was…’ He shook his head. ‘So many losses. So much…’ He paused.

At that moment, she wanted nothing more than to take him in her arms, but she settled for taking his hand and rubbing her thumb over his knuckles.

‘When I agreed to come to London with Ed, I told him I was not looking for any kind of entanglement, not looking for love, and most certainly not looking for a wife. And I meant it,’ he said, with a good deal of intensity. ‘Then in the gardens with you I… I… realised I wanted to kiss you very badly and I…’ He cleared his throat. ‘I never kissed Juliana.’

Eliza’s eyes widened. ‘Never?’

He shook his head. ‘I never looked at her and felt a burning need to kiss her like I might die if I didn’t, like I did with you at Vauxhall Gardens.’

Eliza felt her face flame. ‘I see.’

He cleared his throat and carried on. ‘I don’t think I loved her at all. When she cried off, I was annoyed and humiliated, but not broken hearted.’

Eliza felt a slow smile steal across her lips as she gazed up at him. ‘That is… good to hear.’

‘Oh God,’ he murmured, looking down at her in a way that made her shiver.

‘What?’

‘I want to kiss you again, and I can’t… we can’t… your reputation. I can’t risk that again. I…’

Eliza froze and then trembled inside as she looked at his mouth. Those glorious lips that had touched hers.

Eliza cleared her throat. ‘Could we… could we walk to the trees and continue our conversation?’ She appreciated his concern, truly she did, but she really needed more time with him. More time alone.

Robert stared at her for a moment and something flared in his gaze. He nodded, and his lips twitched into a smile.

Eliza held his gaze. He was going to kiss her again. She knew he would and frankly she burned for his embrace. She was shaking as she took his arm, and she could feel the tremble in his muscles, too. They ambled towards the taller trees, and once they were out of sight, he turned to her.

‘Oh, Eliza,’ he breathed, and this time just swept her into his arms and kissed her. He held her tight as she wrapped her arms about him and returned the kiss with all the passion in her soul. She opened her mouth and echoed his movements feeling the warmth, the heat of him to her toes. They tangled about each other, touching, whispering, kissing until he gentled the embrace, pulled away and rested his forehead against hers.

‘Good God,’ he muttered. He pulled away and touched her face with shaking fingers. ‘I have never wanted anyone the way I want you right now.’

She captured his fingers and kissed them.

‘I didn’t come here to kiss you; I wanted to talk to you.’

‘Can we do both?’

He laughed softly but then sobered. ‘I’m afraid I must return to my regiment for a little while.’

Her heart wilted a little. ‘Now?’

He nodded and kissed her forehead. ‘It’s the worst possible time, I know. May I write to you?’

‘Of course. May I write back?’

He nodded. ‘Letters are terribly important to soldiers.’

‘Then I shall write a lot of letters.’