Page 184 of Top Shelf

Me: I do not trust this.

Min fru: Neither do I. I stared at it for twenty minutes daring it to be a problem.

I can picture her doing exactly that.

Me: How are you?

Min fru: Tired.

Min fru: Proud, though.

Me: You should be.

Min fru: I know. I think I’m finally starting to believe it

Me: Good.

Min fru: Still overwhelmed. Still pissed off. But today was better.

Me: I am glad.

Min fru: Anyway, I just wanted to tell you.

My eyes close slowly, and I sigh as I blink open to type a reply.

Me: You can always tell me.

For a while, nothing comes through, and I make my way to bed. But when I am sinking into the pillows, my phone buzzes again.

Min fru: I really fucking miss you

I stare at the words until they blur slightly.

Me: I really fucking miss you too.

Min fru: Goodnight, Viktor x

Me: Goodnight, min älskling

Chapter twenty-seven

Heidi

It’s two days before launch, and I’ve been back in my apartment for a week, but it still feels like someone else’s. Which is ridiculous, because my name’s on the lease, my coffee mugs are in the cupboard, and the dent in the couch cushion exists because I spent three years sitting in the same place with my laptop balanced against my knees.

The pink lamp is back in my own bedroom too, which somehow makes everything worse. I brought it back here because it’s the piece of me I’ve carried through every part of my life. Now every time I turn it on, all I can see is Viktor standing in our temporary bedroom with sad eyes, asking if I was leaving him.

So that decision is going as well as a sledgehammer through glass. But, to my relief, the studio is going better. Not smoothly, because I don’t believe there’s a business launch in human history that has ever been allowed to happen without at least one supplier delay or a printer eating something important. But definitely better than a week ago.

Pulse has stopped twitching like a nervous horse about visibility, and the waitlist is climbing. Rhys Morgan’s testimonial in particular has been shared enough times that Zoe keeps sending me screenshots with increasingly aggressive exclamation marks, and Mila has somehow bullied three local athletes into filming reaction clips without making any of them look like they were held hostage.

And more importantly, the questions directed at me have changed. I notice it this morning when Zoe drops a media request into our group chat.

Zoe: Denver Sports wants fifteen with YOU tomorrow. Women in sports medicine / post-rehab performance / studio launch.

Me: Just me?

Zoe: Just Dr. Heidi Grant, Founder and Specialist™️