Page 77 of Paging Dr. VanRyan

One weekend, watching a game with some of my coworkers, a friend showed up I hadn’t seen in a while. I stood and shook his hand. “Alan, how are you?”

He sat down, accepting a beer. “Great. Just got back.”

“You were on some sort of volunteer thing, right?” I asked.

He nodded. “I joined an organization called Caring Hands. We go to various places that lack proper medical care. I was up in Yellowknife for a couple of months on a humanitarian relief trip.”

“Wow.”

He nodded. “It’s a great chance to practice and hone your skills. You have to rely on yourself and your team. No fancy equipment or hospital guidelines. You learn to listen to your gut even more. I think it makes me a better doctor, and it gave me a sense of purpose, if that makes any sense. Plus, it reminds me how good we have it.”

“How did you get involved?” I questioned.

“Through a friend. I’ve signed up for another one in a few months. You don’t have to travel halfway around the world to help. There are communities here without medical access. We treat a lot of patients.”

Another friend joined us, but later on, I sought Alan out again. “Can you get me an introduction to Caring Hands?”

“Really?”

I nodded. I’d been adrift. Going through the motions. Even with the recent excitement and upheaval in my family due to a surprise new daughter my father had found out about, I felt removed. I needed a focus, and this sounded intriguing.

“I would,” I confirmed.

“I’ll set it up.”

My boss, Dr. Michael Warwick, frowned my way but shook his head in resignation. “I hate to lose you for even a few months, Matthew, but I understand. This is an excellent cause.”

“I think I’ll learn a great deal.”

“You will. The organization has a good reputation.” He studied me. “You’ll come back an even better doctor. And that is saying something since you are already one of my best.”

“Thanks.”

“Maybe the time away will help you as well.”

I didn’t reply, only shrugging. I knew I wasn’t the same as I had been. I was quieter than ever. Focused on work and not much else.

I had thought it would get better, but weeks down the road, I missed Maddy more now than I had when we’d broken up.

I needed a change. Streets where I didn’t expect to see her. Places I hadn’t taken her. My condo was filled with her ghost. I couldn’t use the one break room. Every time I walked in, I remembered our time together. The passion. The laughter. The joy of the moment. Now I slept in a small, stuffy room no one else liked if I had a break. It held a reclining chair and a small table and smelled of the fumes from the cleaning closet beside it.

I didn’t care.

“So you’ll grant my request for a leave?”

“Yeah.”

I stood and shook his hand. “Thank you.”

CHAPTER 19

MADDY

My phone rang, and I smiled when I saw it was Sue. We had a standing call now on Sundays, in the morning at eight. Before my day became crazy and she went to the bakery. She liked to be prepared for the week ahead, and she found Mondays were the busiest day now, so she did a lot of prep on Sundays. The two girls she’d hired handled the front of the store, and she baked—enjoying the freedom it afforded her in the day.

“Hi,” I greeted her.

“Hey, sweetie. How was your week?”