Page 60 of Knocked Sideways

“Is that your way of saying you want his number, but only if I didn’t sleep with him?” Jed asked, sounding—mad. Yeah, he was pissed.

Damn it, thought Remy. Did Jed truly think Remy was asking for Victor’s number? Had he really not gotten the message the night before?

Remy could feel the heat spreading all the way down his neck. He opened his mouth and then shut it, not sure where he was going with this.

“Never mind,” said Jed, as Remy finally decided on saying, “Would you give it to me?” Because hell, if that’s where Jed was, Remy needed to know.

“If that’s what you want,” Jed said shortly.

“I mean, is there a reason I shouldn’t?” Remy asked. Please say there’s a reason I shouldn’t.

“I said I’ll give it to you if you want.”

Remy pulled into the garage and looked at Jed like maybe his face would have an answer as to why this was the conversation they were having, when it wasn’t at all the conversation Remy wanted to have. Jed looked back at Remy, as hard to read as ever, like he was deciding whether to say anything more.

“Just—Victor’s pretty firmly committed to playing the field. He only does open relationships. No interest in monogamy. If that’s important to you.”

“Ah. I mean, I know lots of people have open relationships. Or whatever. That’s cool. Not really my thing, though. Unless I was with someone who needed that, I guess.” Great. His mouth and brain had disconnected again. He’d thought he was past that. “Anyway. I guess I’m back to my first question.”

“Whether I was sleeping with him? Or whether I was upset that he was hitting on you for some other reason?”

Remy really wished they weren’t sitting in the dark so he could see Jed’s eyes more clearly. His voice wasn’t giving anything away.

“Uh, both? Like, probably either would make him a no for me. Since, you know⁠— “

“We’re teammates?”

“Yeah, but, also, like⁠—”

“I wasn’t sleeping with Victor.” Jed took off his seat belt and opened the door. “We were together for a short time my first year here. It didn’t last.”

Remy noticed he didn’t answer the more important question.

“And?”

“And what?”

“Why were you upset?” Please say it’s because you don’t want me to sleep with anyone else. He needed Jed to put him out of his misery now.

“If you want to fuck Victor, I’ll give you his number.” Jed was finally starting to show something in his voice. He sounded a little tired and a lot grumpy. Like he didn’t realize that’s not what Remy wanted at all, but Remy wasn’t going to say so, because damn it, he’d put himself out there when he kissed Jed in the kitchen. Jed was the one to step away, so it was his turn to do something about whatever this was between them.

Remy had really thought they were on the same page about something happening between them after Lily left. Especially after how Jed acted all day, taking him and Lily out. How he’d looked at Remy that evening, how he’d acted in the club. But maybe Remy was wrong. Maybe he was really wrong, and he needed to go inside and take a cold shower and pack his bags and move out.

“Well, I’m going inside.” Jed got out of the car, and Remy let himself sit in the dark for a minute before following. Jed had to know that Remy didn’t actually want to sleep with Victor. Sleeping with the same guy once was weird enough. Even if he could never have Jed, Remy wasn’t going to make the next person he slept with another one of Jed’s former hookups.

Also, what the hell was Jed’s deal playing cool like that? Jed had to know he’d been the one to slow things down the other night. He was the one who’d walked away when Remy had been right there, obviously aroused. So, by rights, if he wanted something to happen between them now, he was the one who should say so. It wasn’t fair for him to expect Remy to put himself out there again.

But. Remy didn’t think he could keep doing this. He was driving himself crazy trying to figure out what Jed wanted and whether there was any hope of something happening between them. If Jed would just tell him, one way or the other, he could focus on getting on with his life like he should have been doing this whole time.

Before he could lose his courage, he followed Jed into the house, dumping his hat, coat, and boots in the laundry room instead of neatly putting them away like Jed always did. Jed’s boots had been kicked off and left by the door, too, so maybe Jed wasn’t so calm and collected, either.

And Jed hadn’t gone straight to his room, so maybe he also didn’t feel like the conversation was over. From the sounds in the kitchen, he was making tea—the kettle was bubbling, and he was moving around quietly, opening and closing cabinet doors. He didn’t make a lot of noise for such a big guy.

Running his hands through his hair, Remy took a deep breath and walked through the kitchen door.

“Want some?” Jed asked, voice still tight, not looking up from where he was pouring steaming water into a mug.

“No.” Remy stepped further into the kitchen. “Jed. Did you really think I wanted to hook up with Victor tonight?”