Page 121 of Love Decoded

An exhale blows out of me. “All of that is true. But…none of those things were the issue.” I place my hand on the side of his face and say softly, “I can’t be with you when your job stands for things I’ve been running away from. I’m sorry.”

He’s already shaking his head, and I can feel his panic. “Wait, but— No, I’ll quit. Charli, I’ll quit.”

But the ghost of my father is too close to this moment for me to believe him. I’ve heard this line too many times, heard it excuse too many actions I disagreed with, to take it at face value. In my experience, words are meaningless.

“I’m sorry,” I whisper. “I don’t believe you.”

He opens his mouth to say something, looking pained, but I cut off his words with a kiss.

That pain shines brighter when I pull back. I’m hurting, too. But I still know this is the right decision, for myself and for us.

“Thank you for saving my life,” I whisper, choking on the words. I swallow thickly and add, “Thank you for taking care of me these past few weeks.”

“Charli, just wait⁠—”

But I’m already up and out of the bedroom.

As I pass through the living room, I see Nico is still sleeping, but Alexander’s eyes open as soon as I pass by the couch. They follow me toward the guest suite where I need to grab Milton and the rest of my things.

I slow before I reach the hallway. Then, quietly, I tell Alexander, “Thank you.”

He doesn’t respond, just nods.

I wish I could get to know this family. I wish I had the luxury of immersing myself in the rest of Lucas’s life.

The thought makes my chest ache. Wrapping an arm around my middle, I hurry to grab my things.

I can’t take everything, but I can take the important things. When I enter the living room again, Nico is awake and Lucas is standing near the entryway, pulling at his hair.

“Charli, please,” he begs. “Don’t leave. I’m going to quit my job, I swear. I’ll find a new one. A good one.”

As beautiful as that sounds, I know it’s just the adrenaline and desperation talking. He’s already shown how hard he clings to his job. They’re pretty words, but he wouldn’t be able to actually do what he’s saying.

Instead, I turn toward Nico and say, “Thank you. For saving me. And—” I try to blink away the tears. “I’m so sorry I put you all in danger.”

Lucas’s desperation mounts. So does my heartbreak.

“Charli, you have to believe me. I just need⁠—”

Suddenly, I spin toward him, my hand going to his chest to stop him in place. I can feel his heart beating like crazy under my palm, giving away just how much Lucas is panicking.

Maybe that’s the reason for my next words, or maybe it’s sheer desperation on my end that has me saying, “Lucas…I’ll believe it when I see proof.”

I don’t know what I expected his reaction to be—I wasn’t really thinking beyond my own hope that he is telling the truth. But whatever I expected, it wasn’t seeing Lucas’s jaw flex, muscles snapping as a fierce look of determination appears.

“Fine,” he says tightly. “I can respect that. But I will do it, Charli. And then I’m coming after you.”

God, I hope so.

I want to kiss him goodbye so badly, but I know if I get that close to him, I won’t be able to pull myself away.

So I just whisper, “I hope so. Goodbye, Lucas.”

THIRTY-EIGHT

LUCAS

“Fuck,” I spit, pacing the length of my living room. “Fuck, fuck, fuck.”