Page 263 of Carved in the Shadows

Dark and light and so perfect that I winced with its weight all while I wanted to fall into the security of it.

He pulled the door shut behind him, and the locks clicked into place.

My heart thunked in time.

“I didn’t say that, Elena.” It was a raspy appeal.

I slowly turned around, trying to prepare myself for the blunt impact of seeing him.

He hovered in front of the doorway, a burly, towering beast so wide he nearly touched both sides.

A black tee Phoenix had given him was stretched taut across his wide, wide chest.

Hands in fists and binding up all that strength that bristled underneath.

Turmoil mangled his face. Like he was being carved into pieces the same way as I felt.

“Then what is it you want to say?”

Please, admit it.

Please, choose me.

Misery rolled out of him, and he shifted on his feet. His tattooed throat bobbed as he swallowed. “That I don’t want this life for you.”

I choked over the disbelief.

What a cop-out.

“Really, Trevan? You don’t want this life for me? Do you not listen to anything I say?” Frustration flooded out the demand, and I took a pleading step forward. “This is my life. This is my family. And I already told you I’m not going anywhere. I’m a part of it every bit as much as you, and that’s not going to change.”

“It’s not a good life, Lena.”

“I get it, Trevan. I get the risks. I feel the pain of it. The fear of losing what is most important to us. I felt it tonight.” I clutched at my chest as I let myself fully go.

I refused for us to be carved in the shadows for any longer.

This secret that I kept.

“Because losing you would destroy me. Either way, Trevan. If you turn your back on me now or if I lost you in the future. You are a risk I’m willing to take.”

Affliction flashed and fired across his features.

“Don’t you get it, Elena? I have to turn this off. This cannot exist.”

The words ground into the floor like he could crush them.

Another blow. One that rocked me back. But I wasn’t letting it take me down. I had come too far to pretend or ignore.

“Maybe I don’t exist for you, but you exist for me. You’re here, in my heart.”

I splayed both hands over its turbulent thrumming. “I love you, Trevan. I’ve loved you for years, and it’s not a simple or infatuated love. It’s this thing that burns inside me. It’s your ferocity. It’s your care. It’s your willingness to sacrifice everything for those less fortunate. It’s your loyalty to the club and your commitment to this family, even when you don’t realize you’re an intrinsic part of it.”

I inhaled a shattered breath.

“It’s the way I feel every time you walk in the room, and after what happened tonight, I couldn’t go one more day without you knowing. Not after I thought I might not get the chance to tell you. So now you know. It’s you, Trevan, it’s you. Even if it’s not me for you.”

My tongue stroked over my dried lips. “And I won’t be something you’re ashamed of any longer, and if I’m not worth the risk, if you’re not willing to take a chance on me, then this has to end. Right now. I’ll text Silas and ask him to send over another guard. So, you tell me, Trevan. Am I worth it? Am I worth the risk? Am I worth taking the chance? Because I choose you, and I need to know if you love me back.”