Page 150 of Graves

Even in her black heels, she’s half a head shorter than me. The warmth she radiates is boundless and washes away every doubt I had about calling her.

“Hi… I… uh… didn’t want to cause any trouble, but…”

When Selene spots Koh behind me, her expression softens into pure maternal love. “Kohaku.” She opens her arms and embraces him into a tight hug. “We’re going to get through this. Don’t worry.”

It hurts to watch Koh cling to her.

“You’re coming home with me for now,” she says, gently easing back. “Then we’ll figure out the next steps.”

Koh turns to me, his gaze vacant.

I force a pained smile and nod encouragingly. I hurry into the bedroom and pack his clothes into a bag, then bring it to the door.

“What about you?” he asks, stepping closer. “Is there no hope left for you?”

“I’ll be fine,” I say, holding out the bag.

He doesn’t take it. Selene does, already saying her goodbyes.

“What about us? When will I see you again?” Koh asks. “I don’t want this to be over. I missed you too much, despite everything.”

“I missed you too,” I reply, taking his hand. “But I need to sort out my own shit first before I can be the man you deserve.”

Koh hugs me and squeezes tight. “I know where you live, Aran Graves. Don’t think you’re getting rid of me that easily.”

I hug him back, breathing him in. “Don’t you dare ignore my messages. Got it?”

“Got it.”

I cradle his face in my hands and kiss him softly. He slides his hand to the back of my neck and rests his forehead against mine.

“I don’t want to lose you,” he whispers, voice trembling. “Please don’t let your demons win. You have such a big heart. Don’t keep it locked away from the world anymore.”

His words pierce straight through my chest. Koh may have been blinded and manipulated by Luke, but he sees right through me. He sees what I hide from the world—and from myself. The chain around my ribs constricts, and it’s getting harder to stay strong for him.

But he sees that too. He kisses my cheek and leaves.

I stand there for a long time, trying to hold on to the feeling he gave me.

It’s beautiful, and exactly what I’ve been longing for.

32

—

Koh

“When I listen to your story, it sounds like you’ve already developed some solid strategies for dealing with your past,” Dr. Mason says, his voice reassuring. His bushy gray eyebrows knit together. “The crease between your brows tells me you don’t believe me.”

“Strategies or not,” I sigh, shrugging. “I know I’ve fucked up. Honestly, I’m surprised my stepmother didn’t have me committed right away.”

“Don’t be so hard on yourself. Of course, the incident from two days ago is something we’ll examine more closely, but for the next few sessions, I think we should focus on helping you find some stability again.”

“And how exactly is that supposed to work?”

I’m skeptical, and honestly, it feels absurd. I actually feel pretty okay right now. But that’s probably just because I’ve spent the last hour giving Dr. Mason the fast-forward version of my life story.

“There are different approaches for patients who’ve experienced manipulation, abuse, and violence,” the psychiatrist explains. “Trauma-focused cognitive behavioral therapy, behavioral experiments, schema therapy… We can also work with the ‘inner child.’ But everything in its own time. The most important thing right now is that you feel safe here. You set the pace. You decide what you want to tell me and when. That’s how we’ll work. You’re in control. That’s important, because control was taken from you far too often in the past.”