Page 105 of Graves

I’m glad when Liam’s mischievous smile returns and the pity leaves his face.

“And I brought these,” he says, pulling two small baggies from his inside pocket—pills and coke.

A switch flips in my brain. Hunger surges through every fiber of my body. A dark shadow falls over me and all I want is to snort the line Liam’s waving in front of my face, but I’m immobilized, staring straight through him.

Liam scans the apartment and raises an eyebrow. “Don’t you have a roommate?”

The first thought of Koh triggers a wave of panic. I snap out of it and feel the urge to hide, knowing he could come back any second.

“I chased him off,” I say, motioning for Liam to follow me into the studio.

“How?” he asks, amused.

“I’m an asshole. Forgot already?”

Liam sighs. “Sounds like it got complicated.”

“Everything’s complicated,” I say and leave the door slightly ajar.

Liam drops onto the couch, tosses a to me, and opens his own. I sit in the chair in front of the mixing board, spin it toward him, and prop my feet on the edge of the table.

“Douglas lost his shit. Tore into the head of security and demanded to know how the hell that could happen.” Liam raises his can. “To the third gig.”

I lean forward and clink cans with him. After a big gulp, he sets the beer down and cuts lines on the coffee table.

“It’s not exactly surprising that people like that are in the audience.”

“You really believe that?” Liam narrows his eyes.

I shrug and watch him chop the coke with his credit card.

“What kind of person buys a ticket just to pull that shit? I mean… they seemed serious.” He points at his own neck and swallows visibly. “Guys like that belong in prison. Not someone like you who didn’t even do it on purpose.”

Without waiting for my reaction, Liam leans down and does two lines. When he sits back up, he rubs his nose and hands me the rolled bill.

“I mean… you were legally released,” he continues. “A judge decided that. There’s nothing to argue about. That guy should’ve saved his money and given the ticket to someone who wanted to see us.”

“Hm,” I grunt in agreement, snorting the last two lines.

The effect hits instantly, showing me how much the high had already faded. All the stress melts off me. The fear and self-doubt vanish into thin air.

Energized, I get up and crack my knuckles.

“So let’s hear it!” Liam’s drug-fueled enthusiasm has always been contagious, but I stare at him like I have no idea what he’s talking about.

“We wouldn’t be sitting here if you didn’t have new stuff.” He sits spread-legged, arms draped over the back of the couch, grinning at me expectantly.

“We’ve hung out here plenty of times without making music,” I reply dryly.

“You’ve got something. Don’t you?”

“Yeah,” I admit. “But it’s not…”

I don’t have the right words for what I’ve recorded since getting out. Koh called it noise, but I’m just trying to get out what’s been screaming inside my head almost nonstop since my release.

“Come on! Don’t leave me hanging. You were gone five years. There’s no way nothing built up. I know you too well.”

I stand in the middle of the room and fold my arms. I can barely believe there’s a party going on in my head right now.