Page 113 of Icebound

I think she tries to smile, but it looks like she ate something that tastes bad. “This. Us. It’s becoming too much for me, and seeing you hurt on the ice…” Her voice shakes. “I was so worried, and it really scared me. It just made me realize that I need to go before things get too deep. I’m leaving for Argentina, and you need to focus on rehab, so I don’t want to hold you back. Your team needs you to get better.”

She might as well slam me into the boards. That’d be less painful. “So, you’re stopping this?”

“Yes.” She swallows thickly. “You should focus on rehab, and I need to finish school and get ready for my fellowship. I know you want a family and marriage and all that, but I’m just not there yet. I’d have to give up everything to be with you, and I’m not in a place to do that for someone.”

My heartbeat quickens, pounding through my bloodstream. The feeling is so overwhelming that I forget about the throbbing in my shoulder. I’m trying to understand what she’s saying, but it’s not making sense.

“But you’ve got a drawer at my place?”

That was a dumbass response.

“It’s just a couple of T-shirts. You can keep them.”

I sit up, grasping for anything. She can’t leave. “What about the charity auction? Do you still want me to go with you? We can go as friends.”

I flinch. There’s no way those words came out of my mouth. I can’t be her goddamn friend after knowing what she tastes like. What it feels like to be inside her. What makes her smile and laugh.

She shakes her head. “No, I can’t be platonic with you. We both knew this was never going to last.”

“Don’t do this,” I beg. “Don’t end this earlier than it needs to. What’s the point? You’re leaving anyway, and I want to spend every moment I can with you.”

“I know, but I need to try and protect myself, and I need you to respect that. You’re amazing, Rhode, but this is too hard for me.” She swipes at the tears under her eyes. “Focus on rehab. I need you to get better, so I can watch you win the Cup next year.”

She’s right. I know she is, but it feels like I’ve been bodychecked. I can’t even fight for her because what would I be fighting for?

Nothing.

I’d have to ask her to give up her dreams in exchange for mine, and like hell am I going to be the man who stops her from dreaming.

The best thing about dreams is that no one can control them, and I want hers to run wild. I can’t form a single sentence because I’m afraid if I speak, I’ll beg her to stay. I nod instead, swallowing around the burning in my throat.

She waits for me to say something, but when I don’t, she walks forward, hesitant, and I go still when she lightly presses her mouth to mine in the quickest peck, but something detonates inside me.

It takes everything in me not to open my mouth, slide my tongue between her lips, and demand more like a greedy bastard.

“Goodbye, Rhode,” she whispers against my lips. “In another life, I think you would’ve been my forever.”

Yeah, but I want her in this life.

And fuck, maybe it’s on me to figure out how to make that happen.

She walks out without looking back. I watch my apartment door close, and I can’t help but feel like this girl stole something from me that I’ll never find again.

27

RHODE

“Gross, you have a beard.” Wyn kicks my apartment door closed with her golf shoes, striding past the skates I tossed by the coat rack that’s empty due to the warm late April breeze.

It opens a second later, and Cruz struts through with a scowl. “Did you really just slam the door in my face, Wyn?”

“That’s what you get for not listening to me when I said to take I-40. It took us an extra twenty minutes to get here.”

I ignore their bickering and focus on the bland chicken breast spinning in the microwave. Wyn nudges me out of the way, pressing the stop button. “What are you doing? We’re getting lunch with Dad in thirty minutes. Go change and shave that beard. It’s not a good look for you. It’s giving seventies dad and not the hot kind.”

“It’s hard to shave with my left hand,” I say.

Thankfully, the sling comes off in a few days.