Page 56 of Never Not Friends

My dreams.

And, most especially, my heart.

EMMA

9th Grade - April

It’s taken me two days to work up the courage to confront Juliet about the soccer game bleachers and Vinny. But I think I’m ready.

I’m on it.

Today, as we walk home from the bus.

Like right now.

Well, as soon as Juliet finishes her story about how Mrs. Vassau yelled at their fifth-period class and then ran out crying. A riveting story under any other circumstances.

The second there’s a pause in conversation, I force myself to speak up. My voice lacks confidence, but I stumble through. “So…I saw you…with Vinny the other day…at the soccer game.” If only my heart could chill out a little bit, then maybe this wouldn’t feel so difficult.

“Oh, yeah.” Juliet shrugs like it’s no big deal. “I wanted to talk to you about that.”

My brows lift. “You did?”

That’s nice. She wants to apologize for flirting with my ex-boyfriend and hurting my feelings. A true friend.

She turns to me with her pretty-please expression, the one she uses whenever she wants me to do her biology homework for her. “Vinny and I have been texting back and forth a little bit…”

They’ve been texting?

Knife to the back. I think it lanced an important internal organ. Somebody should check to see if I still have a pulse.

“...and I really like him. Like a lot.” The statement hangs in the air between us, decimating my soul. Juliet adds a pouty frown to her expression. “So I wanted to see if it would be all right with you if I went after him.”

Shock rounds out my gaping mouth. “Vinny?” The pangs in my heart get heavier. “You’re asking me if I’m okay with you going after Vinny?”

“I know you had first claim on him and still like him.”

Correction. I love him.

“But you broke up with him.”

Because my parents made me.

“You can’t expect everyone to stay away from him just because he used to be your boyfriend.”

Most of my life, I’ve bent to what others wanted. I make myself small or give in easily, and I don’t mind at all. I like making others happy if I can. That’s how it’s always been with Juliet.

When we were little, I let her have the best dollhouse furniture or the cutest Furby. And whenever we reenacted Hannah Montana, Juliet got to be Hannah, while I had to be her love interest, either Oliver Oken or Jake Ryan.

I didn’t mind. I swear.

But Vinny is the one thing I refuse to bend on. I already did that once for my parents, and look where that got me. I’m not going to do it again with Juliet.

“Well”—I can’t believe I’m saying this—“it would kinda suck for me if you went for him.”

“I know.” She puts her hand on my arm. “That’s why I wanted to talk to you about it first.”

“Yeah.” I nod. “You two together wouldn’t be my favorite thing.”