Page 55 of Cadell the Dragon

“Dear God, how could the man do that to her? Let her believe he was dead and then resurface to upend her life a second time, and this at the worst possible moment?”

“My thoughts precisely,” Cadell said through gritted teeth.

However much he tried to understand the cold logic behind it, it had been a rotten thing to do to a woman who had spent most of her married life waiting for her husband’s return. Though Rhun could not have predicted that his wife would remarry so quickly, he would still have known that his reappearance would be a shock when he did eventually go back to her. What had he hoped would happen anyway? That they would resume their marriage as if nothing had happened? As if he had not betrayed her trust?

“So… What now?” Siaspar asked slowly. He looked devastated on his behalf. “Since she’s not a widow, Johanna cannot marry you. But what does she mean to do? Go back to Rhun and⁠—”

“Rhun is dead,” Cadell interposed. “Really dead this time. I saw it with my own eyes. He died in Johanna’s arms yesterday morning.”

This second revelation stunned Siaspar as much as the first had. “Dead. But how?”

In a flat, detached tone, Cadell told his brother about the English retinue’s arrival at Bryn Glas the day before, Sir Hubert’s outrageous proposition and all that had ensued. So much had happened in just two short days… Was it any wonder he needed time to stop his head from reeling? Would he ever recover from the shock? Would he and Johanna ever be able to resume any kind of relationship after such an upheaval? They should be married right now, starting their life together. Instead, he was about to leave for England, alone, and would likely stay there for months.

He sighed. When would they be allowed to lead the happy life they deserved?

“I’m leaving for England. That is why I’m here, to say goodbye.”

This last declaration, on the tail of so many others, seemed to be too much for Siaspar to handle. “You’re leaving? For England?”

“Not permanently. I will be back. But as he was dying, Rhun asked me to find his cousin, Rhiannon, whom he believes to be in a dangerous situation. It’s going to take a while, as I’m not sure where to look.”

Judging from the tightening of his lips, his brother didn’t seem to think this a valid reason to abandon the woman he loved. “You don’t have to go yourself, I could send someone to⁠—”

“No. I promised a dying man. I cannot go back on my word.”

“You promised to help his cousin, and that is commendable, more than many men would do, actually. But that doesn’t mean you have to go in person and do something that will keep you away from Johanna for months,” Siaspar pointed out, ever the reasonable man. “Are you sure that leaving now is what you want to do? The woman you love, and who loves you, is finally free. Marry her while you can, do what you intended to do two days ago, what you have been wanting to do for half your life.”

Cadell ran a hand through his hair. The temptation to do just that was great; he did want to marry Johanna, now more than ever. But as he’d already established, things were not so simple, in his mind, at least.

“I know. But don’t you see? It is only because of the death of a man that we can be together, a man who betrayed Johanna’s trust, and yet chose to save me, a near stranger. A man who died in her arms in a shocking manner. A man who knew all along the feelings I harbored for his wife. Her husband. It makes me feel…” He stopped, not sure quite how to describe it. Foolish? Vulnerable? Indebted? “Staying away will be hard, but it won’t be forever. I’m not giving up, only doing the one thing that guarantees I can come to accept Rhun’s sacrifice. I’m sure the love we have is strong enough to overcome this last obstacle.”

“Yes. I understand.” Siaspar filled both their cups again. “But stay tonight, at least. We will try and piece together all we know about Rhun’s family. We can go talk to Peredur this afternoon. He might have some useful information as well.”

That was a good idea. Their friend seemed to know everyone in the area. Cadell might save himself weeks of research by listening to what he had to say about Rhun’s family.

But even if it did not, half a day’s delay would make little difference, as Siaspar had said.

“What did you tell everyone to explain that the wedding was not taking place?” At last, he asked the question that had been lurking between them. “What did you tell the priest?”

“I said you’d received a letter at dawn, as you did. And that, though you didn’t share its content with me, I assumed it was urgent news of home, as nothing less would have made you forsake your bride on the day of your wedding. I assured everyone that you would have sent word to Bryn Glas to warn her and explain everything. No one questioned this.”

Yes. Siaspar was a force to be reckoned with when he wanted to be. And even if some of the guests had been suspicious, there was nothing they could have done.

“Thank you.” He had made the whole thing as painless as possible.

“Here’s what we’re going to say now,” Siaspar declared once they’d emptied their second cups of wine. “As I already told everyone that the letter you’d received that morning had been the cause of your departure, we will make the most of it. No one knows what really was in the missive, or who sent it, save for you, my wife, and me. So we will say that it was a warning from Old Cadwgan. He had received word of marauding English retinues and feared for Bryn Glas’ safety in everyone’s absence. When word of what really happened reaches the village, everyone will assume that he was right to be worried. No one will suspect what really was in the letter.”

Cadell nodded. It was a good idea. And though Rhun had been seen coming back from the dead, no one knew he had spoken to his wife in the solar the night before, or that his reappearance had prompted the sending of a letter and the cancellation of their wedding. They would all assume that Johanna had been as shocked as they had been to see him walk into the bailey, and they would pity her for having been kept in the dark about what had really happened the day of the ambush.

“Very well,” Cadell said, placing a hand over Siaspar’s shoulder. “Thank you, brother. Now, let’s go see Peredur.”

How much longer was she going to wait?

Johanna fought hard against the panic trying to overwhelm her. After spending months waiting for Rhun to deign to come back, here she was again, this time waiting for Cadell. The difference was, Rhun had been her husband. Regardless of his other commitments, he had been supposed to come back to her at regular intervals. Cadell, on the other hand, was not married or even betrothed to her, nothing obliged him to return.

Once he found Rhiannon, he could simply send word to Bryn Glas, assure her that all was well, and that would be more than she was entitled to. If he didn’t succeed in finding Rhun’s cousin, he could decide to spend the next ten years looking for her, or abandon the search, or go live abroad, or marry someone who would make him forget the disaster of the last few months, or he could be attacked on the road like Richard had been or he could decide to become a monk or…anything else.

If any of that happened, she would never see him again.