Page 11 of Promises in the Dark

They shared a love I can only hope to experience someday.

I set the frame back on the shelf exactly where I found it, a hint of a grin tugging at my lips.

For the first time in a while, everything feels manageable. I might even be daring enough to call it calm. It’s like I can breathe again without fearing what lurks around the corner.

However, if you had asked me how things were a few months ago, I would have answered much differently. Because a few months ago, my whole world turned upside down when I was handed my now eighteen-month-old daughter Clara after her mother, Elena, left her with the guards out front and disappeared. A daughter I never knew existed. One I missed watching take her first steps or hearing her first word.

I rub my knuckles across my chest as an ache settles deep in my bones.

But the past doesn’t matter as I’m determined to give her the best life she could ever dream of. A life where she never questions why her mother would abandon her as if she meant nothing.

I just need to find a nanny who will make Clara their priority. Not their second choice.

If only it were as simple as them appearing out of thin air and walking through my front door…

Hey, a guy can dream.

Striding through my mother’s house, I stop in the main room at the sight of my family: Vin, Madeleine, Eli, Mauro, Alina, Leo, Scarlett, my mother, and, of course, Clara. It warms my chest to see them surrounding my daughter, fussing over her and making sure she’s happy.

I watch as Vin steps toward Clara in Mauro’s hold, his arms outstretched. “Where’s my favorite little princess?”

Clara’s eyes light up at the sight of her favorite uncle, her hands eagerly reaching for him. “Win, Win!”

He carefully slips his hands around her and plucks her out of Mauro’s grasp, snuggling her against his chest. “I have a surprise for you after dinner, but you can’t tell your daddy because he thinks I get the worst gifts, but he’s just jealous of my amazing gift-giving skills.”

Clara bubbles with laughter as I fight back a smile. She has that man wrapped around her little finger. Not like I’m one to talk.

She looks around at all of her uncles, aunts, and grandmother with a twinkle in her eye. The love in the air is palpable, and I’m thankful she’ll always be surrounded by it.

I step in their direction, and my mother smiles as she watches me approach Clara. Not long ago, I broke down in my mother’s arms, terrified I was going to fail the perfect little girl in front of me. But it didn’t take long to realize it wasn’t fear that had me unraveling… It was the unknown.

I didn’t know the first thing about babies. Sure, there were a few helpful books I read every word of, but there was no manual. Just this little girl who turned my extremely ordered world completely upside down.

And I quickly became determined more than ever to be the father she deserved. I mean, none of this was her fault. She didn’t choose a mother who disappeared or a father who was entirely ill-prepared for her arrival.

But one simple truth remains.

I’m her dad.

And I’ll spend every day proving I’m worthy of that title.

I might fail along the way. Make a few mistakes here and there. But I’ll try to be the best damn dad for her. Every. Damn. Day.

“Just face it, you’re the worst with gifts,” I say as I extend my arms toward Clara. “Hi, sweetheart.”

Vin spins her away from me. “You see her every damn day. It’s my turn with her.”

My lips curve up. “Maybe I’ll consider hiring you as the new nanny.”

“Nah,” Vin remarks as Clara’s tiny fingers curl around his index finger. “I heard the hours suck and the boss is a major s-t-r-o-n-z-o.”

I sigh, rubbing my temple. “You’re probably right.”

“Hey, not true,” Madeleine says. “This is your daughter we’re talking about. Your own flesh and blood.” She carefully steals Clara from Vin, who sulks. Eli slides an arm around Madeleine’s shoulders and looks down at Clara. “You just want what’s best for her, and no one can blame you for that.”

“But what happens if I never find someone who I trust with her?” I look at Clara, noting our similarities. It would take a damn fool not to see she’s mine with her light brown hair and grey eyes. God, I might be biased, but she’s one cute kid. “I never thought there’d be a time in my life when I loved someone so much I’d take a damn bullet for them, and it scares me.” I release a breath. “I just want someone who feels the same way.”

Is that too much to ask?