Page 81 of Come Take Me Now

It’s boring and a travesty to wake up in my bed during the week, but Dad is being a dick about how many nights I’ve spent not under his roof and claimed I wasted the summer with Enzo instead of with him.

Right…

Because I was with Enzo every time Dad spent days golfing or schmoozing at the country club? No, Dad hasn’t been around. And fuck it, I’m going to Enzo’s tonight. But while Enzo’s working today, I’m going on a long run, then running errands to keep my mind busy—and out of the house.

“Look who actually slept in her own bed last night,” he says when I walk into the kitchen at eight in my running gear. He lifts his coffee mug to his lips, and I hold back a blind rage that makes me want to tip it and spill piping hot coffee all over him.

But he’d just retaliate.

“Oh, Charlie. It’s just summer love,” Clarissa replies. “Nothing more.” She turns to me and looks me up and down. “That Valenti guy’s a bit old for you, don’t you think?”

I push past her to grab a bottle of water from the refrigerator.

“I’m going for a run.”

“To his vineyard?” Clarissa adds.

I straighten my shoulders and take one step closer. “Maybe. Why? Jealous?”

Only Clarissa could make a laugh come off so damn condescending. “Of your predator, thirty-something-year-old boyfriend? Men who go after young girls like you are gross,” she sneers, but the irony isn’t lost on me.

And Enzo’s far from gross.

“What do you mean, thirty-something?” Dad asks her, but quickly focuses back on me.

“Tilly, why don’t you tell your dad just how old he is?”

“I, um, thought you knew,” I stammer and scowl at Clarissa. “Convenient of her not to tell you until now.”

“Don’t blame this on Clarissa. You’re going to end it.” I open my mouth to argue. “I don’t care what you have to say. You’re going to San Diego in a couple of weeks.”

“I’m not ending it! We’re going to do long-distance!”

“Matilda!” Dad yells and grabs my wrist.

“Let go of me,” I snap and yank my wrist free.

Clarissa just laughs again. “It’s cute you think it’ll work out. He’s using you and will put you away wet.”

I squint at her. “You would know what that feels like, wouldn’t you?”

“That’s it!” Dad shoves me, and I fly backwards but catch myself before I crash into the counter.

“You haven’t fucking changed,” I say under my breath.

I’m quick to rush out of the kitchen. I yank my iPod and earbuds from the entryway table and slam the front door behind me. I’m already running downhill before he reacts, and the tears pour out before I can stop them. I should tell Mom or Rick that he’s getting physical again, but I can’t leave Enzo yet. I know I mouthed off, but someone needs to. Clarissa wants my boyfriend.

Breathe. Enzo loves you. Just you. Breathe.

I repeat it over and over as I run further away. Until my chest heaves so hard that I have to stop. I find a trailhead just off the main road and pause, placing my palms on my thighs. My cheeks are soaked with tears, and I finally decide to sit on the dirt trail, bringing my knees to my chest. This summer is making me realize that I always default to this position when something’s wrong or scary.

I should call Enzo. He’d come for me.

But I don’t have my phone because why would I? Just an old iPod that doesn’t even show what’s playing.

I stare up at the bright blue sky as if there were a beacon or satellite above my head Enzo could use to locate me. But nothing. I should know the roads well enough by now to navigate to the vineyard, but I fear I’ve gone the wrong way and wouldn’t have the stamina to make it there. I barely know how to get home.

I lightly rock myself. Was I like this as a kid? Fucking around until I found out? Mom never hit or spanked me, and I definitely tried her patience more than Dad’s, especially in my teen years. Probably still do to this day.