Page 94 of Broken Vows

At least the pain makes sense.

What the hell is wrong with me?

And then, because my brain apparently wants to make things worse, I think of Drew.

“You fucking asshole,” I mutter toward the empty passenger seat. “You shot me.”

I shift gears too roughly, and pain flashes up my arm.

“And now you’re gonna be a dad. You don’t know what the fuck you’re doing,” I say, like he can hear me. “And neither do I.”

The truth of it settles heavy in the car.

I don’t know what I’m doing.

I’m threatening teachers. Fixing cupboard hinges. Letting Theo talk about Carmen like she’s permanent. Thinking about first times like they matter.

No.

This has to stop.

No more waiting for the right moment. No more making excuses because she looks tired or sad or too fucking sweet.

I’ll finish the job. Then I’m gone. Out. Before I turn into whatever the hell Drew became.

At the next red light, I grab my phone and text Ray.

Levi: Finishing the job tonight. It’s a done deal

I stare at the words after I send them.

They look wrong.

Too fucking bad.

26

LEVI

Ifinally get Theo down after twenty minutes of him breathlessly recounting every single detail of the puzzle he worked on with Carmen this afternoon—including how they dropped a piece and spent ten minutes trying to pry it out of Fifi’s mouth.

The second his breathing deepens and evens out, I slip out of his room, ease the door shut, and cross the yard before I can talk myself out of it. I’d told Carmen earlier I needed to talk to her tonight. She’d looked unsure, but she nodded.

We’re not going to be talking.

Time to get this over with. She’s been messing with my head for weeks. Making me hesitate. Not tonight.

I knock firmly on her door. A few seconds later it opens, and there she is—standing in the warm light of the living room in soft pajama bottoms and a little cream top that looks innocent but somehow ruins me on sight.

This is exactly how she gets me. No makeup, no effort, just soft and natural and so pretty it knocks the wind out of me.

I steel myself.

“Wasn’t sure you were still coming,” she says, stepping back to let me in.

Fifi immediately tries to wedge herself between us. Not now, crypt keeper. I gently nudge her back with my boot before stepping inside.

Carmen shuts the door and looks up at me. Those soft eyes watch me, waiting. She’s too damn distracting for a man trying to keep his head on straight.