Page 88 of Snowed In with Benefits

“It’s driving me crazy listening to you excuse what a fuckhead he is, city girl. Say his name one more time and I’ll—” I break off, clenching my teeth.

She looks at me, finally looks at me, and bites her lip. “You’ll what?”

In for a penny, I guess. I form the words deliberately, speaking them evenly, making sure my message isn’t obscured by a conflict of tone. “Say his name one more time and I’ll fuck it out of your mouth.”

The room goes silent. Even the fireplace seems to retreat. She stares at me, her pretty lips parted. Hunter’s eyebrows go up. Beau shifts his weight away from the wall. Okay. Maybe I could have planned that better. Or at all. It came out harder than I wanted, but I’m not taking it back.

Still, my voice softens. “You deserve better, Josie. You deserve more than a man who shows up expecting you to fall in line because he said so.”

She bites her lip again, her eyes wide. She looks lost. She shakes her head like she’s arguing with herself, then looks up at me again.

“What do I deserve?”

I know the answer to that before she’s even finished asking the question. “Whatever you want.”

“Exactly,” Beau says.

Hunter steps closer to her. “What do you want, Josie?”

Her face turns a shade of red, then goes pale. She looks down at her lap, blinking hard. She shifts her shoulders, then her feet. There’s a battle going on inside her and there’s nothing I can do but wait for her to win. I can practically feel the load of should falling down on her head, trying to smother her honest wants. I love her when she’s honest. I want to hear it.

My hands ache. I want to reach for her, pull her up, carry her somewhere safe. But that’s the thing—I can’t carry her out of this. This isn’t a broken fence or a stuck door. This is something she has to open from the inside. All I can do is stand here and make sure she knows the room is hers. That we’re hers. That whatever comes out of her mouth next, nobody in this room is going to flinch.

The fire pops. Nobody moves.

“Tell me,” I say out loud. “What do you want?”

“No pressure,” Hunter soothes. “It’s just us, Josie. You can tell us. Tell us anything, we’ll still be here.”

Beau comes closer. He’s silent, just lending his body to the conversation. His presence. She looks around at all of us. Finally, her eyes land on me.

“I’m listening,” I tell her.

She opens her trembling mouth. “I want you to kiss me,” she whispers.

I step closer, giving her both my hands to pull her off the couch. She stands there, looking uncertain, as if I’d reject her. As if I could. I cup her little face in both of my hands and kiss her mouth. I take my time, tasting the tears that linger there, molding the hesitation out of her mouth. She grabs my shirt and kisses me back. Slowly, painfully slowly, I feel her coming back.

She pulls away with a gasp. She’s breathing hard, looking up at me with life in her eyes. She looks to one side at Hunter, then the other side at Beau.

“I want you both to kiss me, too,” she says.

Hunter is quick to take her up on that. He kisses her and she returns his kiss, tentatively at first, then fully. She pulls away and looks at Beau, who bends down and pulls her against him before kissing her deeply. When that kiss breaks we’re all close to her, our breath heavy.

“Keep going. Keep telling us what you want.” My voice sounds like a growl and I don’t care. She’s coming back to life and I’m not going to let her backslide into the zombie bride she used to be. “Get bossy, city girl.”

She hesitates, blushing. She touches my hand, pulling it toward her. I let her take my hand, but I don’t do anything with it. She bites her lips, her eyes shining. That old shame is rearing its ugly head. Her courage is gone, sapped by the jerkoff in the barn. She tries the same thing with Beau, then Hunter, but they’re on my wavelength. Nobody is moving until she tells us to.

“Use your words,” I tell her.

She takes a breath. “Kiss me again. All of you. Please.”

Beau takes her first, kissing her until she’s flushed and breathless. He hands her off to me. I can taste him on her now, and something under that. The flavor of her, herself, alone. Her kiss isn’t seasoned with tears anymore, but with heat. She kisses me like she means it, and I kiss her like I need her. I gently pass her off to Hunter, who romances her with his mouth in the skilled way that he does.

“Touch me,” she says breathlessly once she breaks Hunter’s kiss.

“Tell me where,” I tell her.

She bites her lip so hard I’m afraid she’s going to draw blood. “Touch my breasts.” Hunter and Beau each take one, molding it in their hands, making her gasp. “Touch my ass,” she tells me, and I do, pressing close to her. Her voice is stronger now.