Page 68 of Best Laid Plans

“Please tell me this isn’t a common thing because I’m not sure I can stomach it,” Citi says.

Before G can answer, there is a commotion at the door, then Blade and Inigo walk in. I feel Lil tense and shrink into herself, making me frown. I look down at her, but her gaze is locked on Blade.

“Lil?”

She swallows and looks up at me. The fear and anxiety in her expression have me cursing. I lift her and sit her in my lap, holding her tighter as she tucks her head under my chin.

“You have nothing to worry about.”

“You don’t know that. He was president back then and I⁠—”

“Have nothing to worry about,” Havoc reiterates, squeezing her shoulder. “I’m the president now,” he reminds her.

Nothing else is said as both approach the table, getting lost in backslaps and smiles along the way.

“Fuck me, it’s good to be back.” Blade groans as he pulls out an empty chair and sits on it. “That ride gets longer and longer.”

“Nah, you’re just getting older and older,” G jokes, which has Blade flipping him off.

Inigo takes a spare seat and does the head nod thing before Blade’s eyes land on me, then drift down to Lil. His expression softens as he watches her tremble in my arms. “Lil?”

She turns her head to look at him. “Hey, Blade,” she whispers, sounding so unlike herself, I want to drag her away from here.

He curses, gets to his feet, and crouches in front of us. “What’s going on in that head of yours?”

“I don’t want you to hate me for lying to you.”

He sighs and cups her jaw. “So much has happened here over the years, it’s difficult to keep track of it all. When Havoc told me your story, or parts of it, I found myself going back over each of our encounters, trying to see the signs that something had changed, that something was different. And you know what I found? Nothing. Up until the night everything went to shit with Bear, I don’t think we really interacted much at all beyond my agreeing for you—or should I say her—to become a club girl. She kept away from me. Now I wonder if it was intentional. But it doesn’t matter now, I suppose. At the end of the day, I’m not sure how I can be mad at you without being pissed at myself and every other brother who was around back then. None of us noticed. And as much as I can stand here and say shit like, you kept to yourself or the club had a lot of shit going on—all of it true—it doesn’t change the fact that something horrible happened to you, and I didn’t check in. I expected you to come to me if you were struggling. But why would you? You didn’t even know me. I’m more mad at myself than anything else right now.”

“I don’t think you should be mad. If you had noticed, with everything that happened, you might not have trusted me enough to have me around, which would have been understandable. But then I wouldn’t have all this. And I wouldn’t have Powers. You turning a blind eye gave me a little breathing room and space to lay down some roots. Don’t feel guilty for that.”

“Turns out I feel guilty about a lot of decisions I made.” He smiles sadly. He’s likely talking about how things went down with Delphi.

Lil must have figured it out, too, because she shakes her head. “This isn’t the same. If you had pushed, I’d have run, and maybe he would have found me sooner.”

He stares at Lil for a long while, as he works through the validity of her words, before eventually sighing. “Maybe. I think I’ll feel guilty for a little while yet, but I’ll work on it.”

“Okay,” she says. She won’t argue with him over it because she’s still dealing with her issues of guilt too.

He gets to his feet and retakes his seat as Lil straightens a little. I tip her jaw up so I can look into her eyes. “You okay?”

She nods, offering me a wobbly but genuine smile.

“It’s good to have you guys back,” Havoc says, leaning forward. “How’s Conan doing?”

Blade grins before putting his fingers between his teeth and whistling loud enough to burst our eardrums. Of course, none of that matters when, minutes later, Conan walks in looking a little leaner than the last time we saw him, but with a smile on his face.

“Well, look what the cat dragged in!” Toot hollers, making everyone cheer. He walks over, snags an empty chair from a nearby table, and drags it over.

“It’s good to see you, man.” Havoc grins.

“It’s good to be seen. Heard you guys have had all sorts of adventures without us.”

Havoc shakes his head. “You don’t know the half of it. Are Sunshine and King coming too?”

“No, they’re visiting Aslanov and Dulce with the kids. Six and Will are going to stop by and visit, too.”

“And by visit, you mean keep them protected while we have shit going down here?” Mack says with a chuckle.