Page 79 of AMS.TER.strum

‘Of course! We’ll ring the bell, and after the little angels barge in, we’ll let them touch everything with those germ-infested hands, and roll on every surface in their cleanliness-challenged clothes that were clean just this morning.’ I follow her lead.

As I rummage in my bag for my bank card and the café’s loyalty card, I see the paint swatches again. Their colour shines bright enough for the coldness and unkindness to be put at bay. So does the notification on my phone. Is it Schadenfreude to be relieved when a relationship falls apart, even when the two people involved aren’t happy?

Luuk and Celina part ways is the legend under the photo with the zigzagged tear added for greater effect.

I quickly type the text without calculating the time.

Me

Just read about you and Celina.

Me

Sorry it didn’t work out.

Me

How are you doing?

We had barely discussed his relationship, but since I knew about her, I can’t pretend now.

Luuk

I’m okay.

Luuk

It wasn’t meant to be.

Luuk

We weren’t the right fit.

Luuk

Talk soon? x

Me

Sure! x

Lola and I walk out on the glorious chilly April morning in the spring colours of the city. There are flowering narcissi and hyacinths and tulips. It’s breathtaking how, where formerly there was only dark ground, now beauty overflows. How nature waking up changes your mood. Or did mine change because of that message? But how will it be, when at some point, one of Luuk’s relationships is meant to be?

Chapter Thirty-Nine

Now

Luuk

By the time Corrie finishes telling me what happened at work, I’m seething. Not because this idiot has dragged my name there, or because Corrie revealed to her that I’m on this side of the pond as she’s been apologizing for. But to use bits of information randomly gathered in order to prove that Corrie doesn’t do her job right is infuriating. Where the hell does that hostility come from? Why is it so strong she can’t contain it? Nobody loves all the people they work or deal with…still, WTF?

But there’s one word that has snagged in my mind, resulting in it doing somersaults. ‘So, boyfriend, huh?’

I gently rock Corrie’s body, something that feels like elation making my chest quiver, despite my teasing tone, but she looks at me in alarm. ‘I just wanted to throw the comment back at her! I was furious at all the bullshit!’

I bury my face in her hair. ‘Hey, it’s okay, why would you deny it?’

She squints at me. ‘Isn’t this too soon? I mean, we’ve just… It all went so ridiculously fast…’