Page 39 of Tinder B@ng

She ends things off, and I am left wondering if I shouldn’t ask her out. It’s best to rip the Band-Aid off right away, I don’t want to text a crawfish for weeks.

I know she’s offline, but I get the last word and hope that I wake up to a reply. It’s a block away from me, so I can take a morning walk. If she shows up, it’s a win; if she doesn’t, I get a coffee and some fresh air.

My morning coffee date was not what I expected; Melissa laughed and even paid for her own coffee. We walked along the river and chatted effortlessly about everything and nothing. When we get to her office, I am relaxed and confident enough to ask if she’d like to join me on a real date.

“Would you have dinner with me tonight?” I ask her.

“I can’t,” she says shutting me down. My heart sinks a little. “I want to, but I’m a single mom. So if I’m going to go out I need a bit more notice to get a sitter.” She seems a bit nervous to say it, she never mentioned being a mom when we talked. Seems like a big thing to omit.

“What are your plans for the holiday weekend then?” It’s almost the weekend, and I don’t want to wait until after to see her again. I like her.

“I’ll be alone this weekend. No big plans.” Her phone is ringing in her pocket. “My little one is going to Daddy.”

“Join me for the Fourth, you said you make a good plus one,” I ask her. If she shuts me down again, then I know I liked this more than she did. If she says yes, I won’t have to sit through the day at Luke’s alone. Her phone starts to ring again. She checks it on her watch.

“Okay,” she says with a smile. “Text me the details. I have to take this call. I enjoyed this,” she adds, pulling her ringing phone out and waving goodbye as she disappears into the building.

This one wasn’t a disaster. It wasn’t scary, and I actually enjoyed my morning. There’s hope after all.

We spend almost every Fourth of July on Montauk at Luke’s summer house; after my divorce the other friends got my wife. They were the only ones that still included me in anything. He was more than a little surprised when I asked if I could bring a date this year. I usually ask if my kids can bring tag-alongs.

Melissa actually agreed to come with me and stay part of the weekend; she has to work Friday and Saturday morning. I’ll wait and drive out with her on Saturday afternoon, we can enjoy the day Sunday and come home again on Monday. I am nervous and excited.

We have chatted more since our coffee, on the phone and texting. She said she didn’t mention being a mom because most guys will ‘ghost’ after they know that. Children seem to be a bigger issue than I ever imagined when it comes to dating. My adult kids were an issue for Channing, and it seems a youngster is even worse when I hear the stories Melissa tells me. There's a connection between us, the fact we’re both single parents in the dating jungle. I relate to a lot of what she says.

The drive out to Luke’s is fun. We talk about music, and how having children keeps your playlist interesting at best. She seems a bit nervous, but this is technically our second date and we’re staying over — I packed condoms. Tala’s dating advice is still fresh in my mind, almost all the time.

“You seem very nervous.” Her fidgeting has gotten worse.

“This is a hell of a second date. I don’t think I’m going to fit in. I am not a fancy girl.” It’s a concern I hadn’t even given any thought to. “I just don’t want to embarrass you.” My kids are more likely to embarrass me than she is.

“You won’t. I don’t get embarrassed.” I don’t. What others think is none of my business, unless they make it my business. She’s an attractive young woman, I wonder who dented her self-confidence this badly.

When we arrive it’s right in the middle of the late afternoon flurry of activity. There’s people all over the house and it’s buzzing with holiday energy. Melissa holds my hand, I think she’s terrified to be left alone. The triplets have been here since Wednesday already, and I’m sure they’ll find us soon enough. The sprawling summer house and grounds are magnificent. Luke is a very successful doctor and he married into old money. The house came with the wife. All I got with my first wife was anxiety.

“You okay?” I whisper to Melissa as we go outside the back of the house to where all the action is. My sons are out on the lawn mauling one another in a game of ‘touch’ football that’s clearly gone too far. Tala and most of the girls she attended school with are sitting in the shade chatting and enjoying some casual under-aged drinking. Luke and a few of the guys are down at the beach. Like all of these functions, wives, girlfriends, dates — whoever are somewhere off doing woman stuff. The men are being all manly. Tala sees us and comes running up the steps to where I am surveying the goings on.

“Dad, hi.” She hugs me hello, and gives my date the once over.

“This is Melissa,” I say, “This is my daughter Tala.” Melissa makes eye contact and a small smile. I don’t miss the recognition in Tala’s eyes either.

“Hi, Tala. Nice to meet you,” Melissa says.

“Come sit with us girls, you don’t want to get sucked in by the old ladies. They’re boring, and we have the good drinks with us.” Tala knows how these things work — she was born and bred into this high society bullshit. Melissa looks at me, checking what the right thing is.

“Go on. I’ll come find you when it's time to get ready for dinner.” She and Tala walk off. I’m no fool; they know each other. I can see the looks being exchanged and the ferocious whisperings. Our world is small, they must have met before. I just didn’t imagine Melissa knowing anyone here — the idea alone made her nervous.

The men drink beer and talk shit about work mostly. I feel a little lost since I no longer work; I don’t give two shits about the stock exchange anymore. I no longer need to. These are all educated, wealthy men, but somehow I still always feel as if I’m surrounded by idiots in company.

“So you finally decided to come out from under your rock and date,” Martin says to me. The heat of the business conversation was getting to him.

“It seemed like the right time, no job, kids are grown. Why not?”

“She’s a pretty one.” I look back to where Melissa is with my children, and answer.

“She is.” She is pretty, and young and nice — and nothing about her is exciting me all of a sudden.

“You surprise me, Kal,” Luke chimes in, “There’s about a hundred country club women dying to get in your suit pants and you pick a nobody from your side of the river.” He’s looking for shit.