Page 51 of Campus Fake

“You’re shaking,” he said.

“I’m fine. Just give me a second.”

I’d forgotten this. The pure joy of just being on the ice. The feel of the air sliding through my hair as I skated forward.

Harry kept hold of my hands and didn’t rush me as I found my glide. It was impossible to be on the ice and not think about Bryce. About him always in the stands with some ridiculous sign, screaming over the music, and embarrassing me in the best possible way.

He would’ve loved this. He would’ve been out here with Eric, racing and talking shit and cheering too loud.

I didn’t deserve to be here without him.

I didn’t deserve to feel the joy that was surging through me at being on the ice again.

I almost pulled my hands from Harry’s and went back to the bench where it was safe, where I didn’t have to feel any of this. But Harry’s grip was steady, and he held me as we moved forward.

We skated in slow laps around the rink, and around the third or fourth loop, I stopped thinking about my legs or even noticing the ache. The pain faded to background noise and was replaced with the thrill of it all.

Harry’s gaze caught mine as he moved in front of me again, skating backward so he could watch me.

Knowing he wouldn’t let me fall, I closed my eyes and soaked it all in.

The feel of the wind hitting my cheeks and through my hair, the glide of my blades beneath me, cutting through the ice, feeling muscles I hadn’t noticed in years.

Under it all was still the guilt and the grief, but it wasn’t the focus. I wasn’t serving penance in this moment.

I was living.

I was alive and being held by someone who wasn’t going to let me fall.

When I opened my eyes, I was crying, but they weren’t sad tears.

I laughed at Harry’s worried face, his brow furrowed, and before he could even ask, I said, “I’m fine. It’s just a lot, but it’s good, I think.”

Harry slowed us to a stop near the boards and pulled me into a hug. I easily wrapped my arms around him, holding him tight. “Thank you.”

“What did I say about thanking me?”

I smiled against his chest before looking up and meeting his gaze. “How about I thank you later?” The heat in my gaze no doubt told him exactly what I had in mind. And whether he wanted me to say it or not, I needed him to know how much gratitude I had where he was concerned. I was grateful Abby had fallen in love with Harry’s best friend and we’d met at that music festival when those two were still figuring each other out. I was happy circumstances had made us roommates and friends long before I’d realized how far I’d fallen for him.

For the rest of my life, I would be thankful for him.

Eric skated past us in a blur. “You two are disgustingly cute. Just so you know.”

“Go away, Eric.”

“I’m just saying! The hand-holding, the gazing—it’s like a Hallmark movie out here.”

“I will end you.”

He cackled and took off toward the far end of the rink, and despite everything, it made me smile.

We skated a few more laps after that, slow and easy, my hand in Harry’s. I didn’t try anything ambitious or push my body past what it could handle, but I soaked in the joy of being on the ice, especially after spending so many years telling myself I’d never do it again.

For a few minutes, everything was good.

And then my mom ruined it.

Harry and I had just stepped off the ice to grab some water when my mom stepped in front of us, her gaze hard and colder than she’d ever looked at me before.