Page 91 of My Craving

“You don’t have to say anything.”

“I kind of fucking do, Nash.”

I watch him rub his thumb across the side of Declan’s hand. Whatever he’s been carrying since last night isn’t something I can joke him out of, so I wait.

“You’re lying in a hospital bed because that knife was supposed to go into me.”

There isn’t much I can say that Declan probably hasn’t already told him, and pretending the thought wouldn’t fuck with me if our positions were reversed would be bullshit.

“Yeah. I’d probably be sitting there feeling like shit too.”

Xavier looks up at me, clearly not expecting that answer.

“But you didn’t put me here. Adrian did.”

I reach across the bed and hold out my hand. He takes it immediately.

“I saw it too. That’s why I moved.”

“I know why you did it.” His fingers tighten around mine. “That doesn’t make it easy to watch you lying here because of me.”

“Not because of you. Because of Adrian.”

Xavier looks down at our hands. “Declan keeps telling me the same thing.”

“Probably because he’s right.”

“I understand that Adrian is responsible. It doesn’t change how I feel when I look at you lying here.”

That, I can understand. If Xavier were in this bed instead of me, knowing I’d been standing close enough to stop it would fuck with my head too.

“I’m not asking you to feel differently about what happened. Just don’t start treating me like I did something you have to repay.”

His eyes come back to mine. “You almost died.”

“And I’m going to be a pain in Duncan’s ass for a long time because I didn’t.”

Duncan makes a quiet sound beside me that tells me he has an opinion about my timing, but Xavier finally gives me a real smile.

I squeeze his hand. “You’re family, Xavier. I wasn’t going to stand there and watch someone hurt you.”

His smile disappears, but not for the same reason this time. “You love me?”

I look at him for a second. Apparently saying family wasn’t enough for him.

“Yeah, asshole. I love you.”

His laugh comes out rough, and before I can give him shit about getting emotional, he leans toward me. I open my arm and let him hug me, careful of my side while Declan keeps a hand on him the entire time.

“I love you too,” Xavier says against my shoulder.

I tighten my arm around him before letting him sit back. “Good. Now stop looking at me like you’re about to cry all over my hospital gown.”

“Fuck you.” He laughs.

Declan pulls Xavier back against him, and when he looks at me, the gratitude is there without either of us needing to say anything else. Duncan’s hand settles against my leg through the blanket while Xavier stays tucked into Declan’s side, and the room starts to feel almost normal.

The exhaustion catches up with me before long. I’ve barely managed to keep my eyes open through the conversation. Duncan notices before I say anything.