Page 92 of Mountain Man

“O-kay…” I brushed my hands together, eyeing her warily. “What’s going on?”

“I’m mad at you. So mad.”

The déjà vu was so strong, I was transported for a beat to the final days of our dying marriage where every day was a fight. But we weren’t married, and we hadn’t been a couple in a decade.

“I see that. What did I do?”

Jess’s nostrils flared and her mouth was pursed unhappily. “You cheated me.”

“Cheated? What are you talking about?” I furrowed my brow, truly confused. “I never cheated on you. I never⁠—”

“I don’t mean with another person. I mean…you didn’t tell me who I was marrying.” Her voice trembled as she pointed a leather-gloved finger at me and continued. “You promised to give me your whole self, and I didn’t get it. I got what you thought I could handle, and I fucking hate that.”

Jess had tears in her eyes, and her face was red. She was serious. I had no idea what had sparked her anger, but we’d been through too much for me to dismiss her.

“We’ve been through this, Jess. I made mistakes,” I conceded. “We both did, but it was a long time ago.”

“And I’m not over it.” She paced to the wall of photos she’d hung years ago and peered into the great room, her arms crossed. “I should be, and I know that. But I just realized that I’ve been wrong. See, I thought I married a cop who got complacent in our marriage and loved his job more than me. It was pretty cut and dried in my mind. I was so tired of always feeling like an afterthought and getting scraps of your time and attention made me feel so small, so insignificant.”

“Jess…”

“So we divorced.” She sniffed loudly. “That was good. Better. Then you came out and yes, it was a surprise, but I understood why you’d waited. Part of me thought that maybe you hadn’t figured out that you liked men until I was gone. It didn’t bother me.” She drew a shaky breath. “Not until there was a man who was getting everything I wanted from you. Your time, your attention, your truth. I feel…betrayed.”

The air crackled like a buzzsaw, electric and fuzzy.

“Betrayed? Because of Waylon?”

“You could have warned me, Reg. You could have introduced me. I’ve met the man, you know. I can see that our kids think he walks on air. This has been going on for months, and you never said a word about him to me. Nothing. Instead, I get to hear about my ex-husband’s new boyfriend from my daughter’s friends’ mothers.”

Ah, the sleepover.

I rubbed my hand over my face in exasperation. “Jesus, Jess. You’ve lived in this town your whole life. You know how it is. I don’t know what you heard, but I promise you, there’s no ill will here. Waylon is a good friend and⁠—”

“Stop it. He’s not your friend.”

I just stared at her. “What do you want me to say?”

“Tell me who he is. Say it out loud.”

“He’s someone I care about. Is that what you want to hear?”

“I don’t know. I just had to get it off my chest.” Jess sagged against the wall, clearly upset and looking prettier than she should have in a camel-colored coat with fur sleeves and designer boots.

This version of Jess had never lived in this house. I wanted to point that out to her. We weren’t the same people we’d been all those years ago. Not even close.

I settled for, “I wouldn’t intentionally hurt you. Ever. There was an accident and Waylon was here and⁠—”

She held a hand up like a traffic cop. “I know. Stop. I don’t want to hear rational explanations. I’m angry. I’m hurt. I’ve heard about what he’s done for your dad, and I think…that was supposed to be me. I was your wife. Your person. I was supposed to be here for you, and those days are over, and I just…sometimes wonder if I made a mistake.”

“No. We did the right thing,” I said gently.

“Maybe. I mean…yes.” Jess yanked a glove off and dabbed at her eye. “God, I want to root for you, Reg. I want you to be happy. I wish you’d let me in, but I don’t get a say anymore. That makes me sad. All those good times just…gone.”

“Hey, don’t be sad. Nothing’s gone, it’s…different now. Neither of us knows how to be divorced. We’re doing our best here, Jess. We’ve got two great kids and in spite of it all, they’re thriving. We did that. You and me.”

She punched my chest lightly. “You make it so hard to hate you.”

“You don’t hate me.”