Page 41 of Breaking the Ice

So I put my palm in his. “Are we getting a manicure together?”

“No, silly goose.” He hands me a roll of quarters from his pocket, which feels like the start of a dirty joke. “We’re here to play.”

“Hmm?” I scan the door of the bar as Evan tugs me towards it, and I read the sign. “Pinball and Pints?”

“Yep. It’s actually awesome.”

And despite the comic bookstore vibes, he’s right. The combination bar and arcade is dark inside, lit up mostly by the glow of neon. There’s a wooden bar along the far side, and the rest of the space is filled with hundreds of retro pinball machines. The hum of the sound effects means no background music is necessary.

“Come on, let’s grab a drink.”

We get two bottles of beer from a bartender wearing blue and white wizard robes and a pointy hat decorated with stars. Evan doesn’t bat an eye at this, so it must be normal. Or maybe typical is a better word for it?

Despite it being different from any bar I’ve ever been to, I kind of love it. Holding our drinks in one hand, Evan steers me towards an old-school pinball machine with a cowboy and a lasso on it.

“This one’s my favorite,” he says, handing me our beers and putting in a quarter. “It’s the oldest one in the place.”

“How did you find this?” I ask, watching him flick the levers of the game. Why are his hands so sexy?

Evan shrugs, not taking his focus off the ball rattling through the maze. “One of the guys on the team told me about it. Mateo. He grew up around the corner. I come here when I don’t want to feel like a college student. But it’s cool, right?”

“It is.” I also grew up in Lafayette, but on the other side of town. It makes sense that I didn’t know about this place. “What do you mean, you don’t want to feel like a college student?”

“I’m not sure how to explain it. Like, I just want to blend in and be normal. I love college life but sometimes it’s a bubble, you know?”

“I’m starting to think my entire life has been a bubble.” His game ends, and he turns to face me, raising a brow, so I elaborate. “Living at home and stuff. I was basically an only child, so I was pretty isolated. And then I went away to college in Pennsylvania, but I didn’t really get out much. This is nice.”

I don’t have many more months before I’ll graduate and be a full-fledged adult. I’ll have to find a job and a place to live. So while this is a silly first step, it feels good to venture out a little bit.

He puts in another quarter and pulls back the pin, launching the ball. He flicks the levers, not taking his eyes off his game but continues talking to me. “I think I can let college define me. Like, I’m just a hockey player, or just a partier, or just a phys ed major. It’s good to remember that I can be all of that, and there’s still more to me.”

I want to know all of him. Evan swigs a drink from his beer, drawing my gaze to his lips, wrapped around the bottle. My body flushes hot, reliving our kiss.

“I think there’s probably a lot more to you than you show.” I take a step closer to him.

He nods. “And somehow, being off campus makes me feel better about letting that out. I don’t have to fit into any particular mold.”

“I like that you can be yourself with me.”

“And do you feel the same? Like you can be authentically you?” His eyes bore into mine, dark like the ocean at night.

“I think maybe I do.” I reach out and brush my fingers over his, still wrapped around his drink. We stand there for a moment, acknowledging each other, until I clear my throat. “Alright, let’s do this.”

Stepping up to a Star Wars pinball machine, I put in my coins and try to focus on the shiny metal ball. Evan leans against it, cheering me on, and pride rushes through me when he compliments my score. The serious mood from earlier is broken, but the intimacy lingers.

We take turns playing, finding the craziest-themed games and seeing who can beat the other. Every time his hand brushes mine, a jolt races down my spine. The way he stares into my eyes confirms that he feels the pull, too.

After we run out of quarters, Evan walks me to my car. Will he kiss me again? I want his mouth on mine more than I want oxygen.

He rocks on the balls of his feet, leaning towards me. “Thanks for hanging. Have a good night.”

“You, too. This was fun.” My voice comes out rusty, like I haven’t spoken in a while. Can he read my thoughts? Would it be good or bad if he could? I bite my lip and try to will him to kiss me.

He steps back and pats the hood of my car, a quick tap-tap. I open the door and slide into my seat, then give him an awkward wave.

My dad’s words from the other night echo in my brain. He’s off-limits in every way.

This is how it has to be, I remind myself.