Page 71 of An Oath at Midnight

“You won’t lose him, you have to know that. Whatever happens from this moment on, he’ll still be there for you. And you know why, don’t you?”

I licked my dry lips, my pulse racing all over again. “How did I miss it, how—”

“You weren’t ready to see it, and maybe you aren’t totally ready now, but you have to decide if you want to be. Don’t let this slip through your fingers.” Her voice changed, becoming more forceful. “Don’t you fucking dare do that. Nothing will ever compare to what you could have with him…with your mate.” Shockingly, her throat worked, emotion filling her eyes. “The years I had with Boone were the best of my life. You’re scared, I get that. But you know what’s scarier? A lifetime never knowing a love like that, happiness like that. Never sharing a connection with someone, a connection that even if I tried, I couldn’t explain the enormity of it. I could never describe the way it feels.” She shook her head.

“Ash…I had no idea.” She’d been mated.

She shrugged. “I don’t talk about it, because it’s mine, and because he still lives with me in here.” She pressed a hand to her chest. “I try to make the best of the time I have left on this earth, because Boone would want me to. But I’m just killing time until I’m with him again. He was it for me. There will never be anyone else who could take his place. You need to think about that when you make your decision. There is no one either of you will ever want the way you want each other.”

My lips trembled and I growled, shutting it down, refusing to cry again. “But I’m…I’m fucking broken. I don’t know if I can give him all of me, I don’t know if I can…if we could ever…”

Her hand tightened on mine, the other gripping my shoulder, and she jolted me, roughly. “Snap the fuck out of it.”

I blinked up at her.

“You’re not fucking getting it, feisty. Bram is your mate. Your mate. There isn’t one thing you can’t figure out together. Not one. He knows you like no one else, he knows what you can and can’t handle. He knows.”

He did.

He’d always known what I was feeling, thinking at least—until recently, when we’d both closed ourselves off to it. Ignored it.

“I can guarantee no matter how long it takes, he’ll wait,” Ash said. “He’ll wait, because making you happy, pleasing you, caring for you, is all he’ll ever want and need.” She gave me a sad smile. “Mags, he’s already been waiting, and he’ll keep on doing it. He’ll wait an eternity for you.”

CHAPTER 18

Magnolia

Asher was fully focused on eating the plate of food Mom had put down in front of her, but I couldn’t even choke down a bite.

“Eat, then rest. You look exhausted,” Mom said and kissed the top of my head before walking out of the room.

There was no way I could rest, not when everything Asher had said to me earlier was on repeat in my head.

I scrubbed my hands over my face, feeling utterly lost. I missed Bram so fucking much.

I couldn’t do this, not without him. Not any of it.

I couldn’t sleep.

I couldn’t think.

I couldn’t fucking breathe.

I missed him so much, I ached. I ached for him. Goddess, it hurt.

Asher cleared her throat, and I looked up.

“What are you thinking?” she asked, looking at me as if she could see everything.

“That I need Bram, and that I’m going to get him.”

She smiled.

“Will you help me?”

She lowered her fork. “What do you need?”

“A ride. But first I need to get a few things together.”