Page 33 of A Trial By Blood

I did. A monster named Azel had held her prisoner since she was a child. He’d abused her, used her for her powers, and forced her to beg for blood. He’d tortured her, and if it wasn’t so hard to kill a dhampir, she’d be dead. Luna managed to kill the evil male, and he went to Hell. Then two years ago, during Willow’s trial, he’d tried to come back. Everyone had kept it from Luna and Ronan at the time, but Azel almost succeeded. “Yes.”

The pain in her eyes returned. “Rose, when Azel killed our mother and abducted me, he took Ronan as well. We were separated for most of our lives, but what I endured, he did as well.”

Oh goddess. How had I not known that? Imagining what he’d been through, I grabbed the edge of the table. “I had no idea.”

“I wouldn’t normally share that, it’s Ronan’s story to tell, but when he comes to you, and he will, he’s going to be…different. He’ll be struggling, and he’ll need your understanding. I’m hoping now that I’ve shared with you, you’ll be able to cut him some slack if he behaves oddly. Or struggles with his impulse control. If he’s out of line, you’ll need to call him on it, correct him if he behaves in a way that’s unacceptable, and explain why.”

“I don’t understand?”

Her head tilted to the side. “You saw Ronan being dragged from your room, yes?”

“Yes, but no one seems to know what happened.”

She smiled softly, but there was still concern in her eyes. “He’s regained his emotions, Rose. But not like me, not gradually. They hit him all at once. Ronan was old enough when we were taken that he has some memory of his life before, when he still had emotion. Those memories had been locked away for most of his life, but a part of his brain obviously recognized what emotion was, because it had processed them when he was little. So when they came back, they came back all at once, overwhelming him. He’s struggling to cope with it, to understand all that he’s feeling. It doesn’t matter that he understood them as a child, they’re foreign to him now.” That pain filled her eyes again. “He’s been through a lot in his life, Rose, and it’s all hitting him now, all of it. So as much as I want to take you to him, he’s in no condition to see anyone, not yet.”

I gripped the edge of the table tighter, my heart breaking for him. Everything in me told me to go to him, that he needed me. Every instinct screamed at me to ignore Luna and fight my way to him. But I couldn’t do that. The last thing I’d ever want to do is to hurt him. “Will you thank him for everything? And tell him I miss him, that I want to see him?”

Luna covered my hand with hers. “Of course.”

“Do you really think he’ll come to me when he can?” Hope filled me.

She grinned. “Oh, yes.” Then she tilted her head to the side, and her expression grew serious again, her eyes sharpening. “And I pity anyone who tries to get in his way.”

I didn’t know what she meant by that. I opened my mouth to ask, but she stood.

“I need to go. I’ll see you in a couple of days.”

Then she walked out, leaving me with even more questions.

CHAPTER 11

Ronan

My body was an inferno, my mind a tangle of unwanted thoughts.

And every single one of those thoughts…or memories, came with emotions and a visceral response. It was too much.

Too much.

An image of Azel, of him touching me, of the way he had used me, filled my head once more, and I crawled to the toilet and vomited. Then collapsed on the ground in a shivering heap.

And all the while, Rose was right there with me. I could feel her, as if she’d become a part of me. She’d drunk a lot of my blood this past week, and now I could feel her. That knowledge was the only thing keeping me sane. I needed that; I needed to know she was safe while I was trying, and failing, to get the fuck off the floor.

I curled my fingers into a fist. I had to beat this.

The sound of the door opening in the main room and then shutting reached me.

“It’s just me,” Luna called.

The knights had brought me here to their compound, but I hadn’t let anyone see me since, not even my sister. They’d even brought me blood, but I couldn’t bring myself to feed.

“Ronan, please.”

The pain in her voice hit me hard in the chest. I’d heard it many times in the last couple of years, but I hadn’t recognized it. I’d been numb, blind to it. Now I felt it deeply. I’d let her down, time and again. I’d stood by, believing the lies Azel spilled. I’d believed him when he said Luna was safe, when all the while he was using her as he had me, for her power, her body, poisoning us with his blood. I’d believed his lies, and my sister had paid for it over and over again.

I didn’t know how to…to process it, how to continue functioning with that knowledge in my head. I smashed my fist into the tiled floor, desperate to release the feeling inside me.

My sister had suffered because of me, because I had been too weak of mind, too gullible to see the truth.