Page 10 of Bad for You

I don’t know why I did it, only that I needed her so badly tonight I couldn’t think straight. That I couldn’t stop myself from reaching out.

She didn’t reply.

I didn’t expect her to.

Lila

I stared at myself in the mirror. My cheeks were pink from riding all day with Everly on Cassy and Cal’s ranch. My best friend trained horses for Dane’s brother and sister-in-law and I went out with her as often as I could.

I missed it. That had been the only good thing about living with my parents. The horses we had on our ranch.

Nope. Not now. Not tonight.

I took a steadying breath.

I looked okay. Nice, actually. I’d been casually dating Brooks Jackson for a few weeks.

He was a nice guy, good-looking, too. I ignored the niggling feeling that kept trying to rear up, that this was all wrong. Because it wasn’t. It was past time to move on.

Bonus. Brooks could ride as well. He also looked pretty great on a horse.

I’d never been allowed to date anyone without my parents’ approval. Which was why I’d only dated Jarod before I moved away.

It’s none of their damned business who you date. Not anymore.

Nope, and that was especially true now. They hadn’t spoken to me since I moved out. They’d cut me off.

Like they’d cut off Kate.

Punishing me for wanting a life of my own. For refusing to let them control me anymore.

It had hurt, a lot. Still did. But I’d gained my independence, and it had been hard won. I forced them out of my head along with the shame, the guilt, all the unhealthy crap they’d spouted while controlling my every move.

My phone vibrated against the bathroom counter and I glanced down at it.

And sucked in a breath.

Jesse: What you reading tonight?

My stomach twisted into a knot. I’d received a random text message from him late at night a week ago.

Hope you’re happy, baby.

I hadn’t known what to make of it, but I’d read it more times than I could count. Now he messaged every couple of days. Like I hadn’t ignored every one he’d sent. I forced myself to look away, to ignore this one like I had all the others

Three minutes later…

Jesse: Bambi? Shit, can we at least be friends?

Friends.

Ouch.

He thought I had nothing better to do than sit at home alone, reading on a Saturday night. For whatever reason, he kept trying to get me to talk to him. Maybe it was guilt? Maybe he wanted me to forgive him for the way things ended between us. Maybe I should? Probably. But I was done ignoring my own feelings to make other people feel better about themselves.

And as much as I wanted to forget the way Jesse ended it, I couldn’t. How could I when the feelings I’d had for him when we first met were still there?

I was trying to move on, to forget him, I was. But he wasn’t making it easy and asking me to be his friend was just another way of letting me know how over me he was. If he’d ever really cared at all.