Page 90 of Sin for You

I rushed back inside, slammed the door shut, and locked it.

I stood there, fighting more tears as he knocked, calling my name, asking me to let him back in.

But eventually, he gave up and left.

Like I knew he would.

Chapter Twenty-Two

Quinn

My phone was ringing when I climbed into my car.

I quickly checked who it was and smiled as I answered. “Hey, Dad.”

“Hey, Quinnie, how’re things?” His voice was cautious, hesitant.

“You’ve been talking to Mase, haven’t you?”

My dad sighed. “Okay, you got me. He did call and he said a few things that got me thinking.”

I fiddled with my jacket zipper. “What kind of things?”

“He thought you might be struggling a bit more than you let on after this whole…after what that asshole Bevan…” He cleared his throat. “After what happened.”

“I’m fine,” I said automatically. I think I’d been doing that since my mom died. Trying to lessen my dad’s worry, especially over me. I guess I did it without even thinking.

“You’re not, though, are you?” he said gently.

“I don’t care about Bevan, not anymore. I don’t. My heart’s not broken over him.” How could it when I thought…God, I thought it might belong to Logan. “I’m going back to Portland in two weeks. It’s time to stop hiding and go back to my life.”

“I thought you might stay in Rocktown,” he said in that same gentle voice. “I don’t think you’re hiding. I think you went home because it’s what you needed. You’ve been there for four months, pumpkin.” He cleared his throat again. “Running from someone or something that’s hard or painful is the easy part—believe me, I know—but it doesn’t make it better, it doesn’t stop how we feel inside.”

Oh God. “Dad—”

“You deserve the best, you know that, right? Bevan never deserved you,” he said, the same words Bull had said to me. “Any man who wants to be with you, he needs to work to prove it. Any man worth anything will do what it takes to prove his worth, Quinnie. Don’t settle for anything less.”

Is that what I’d been doing? Settling for less? I thought maybe I had been.

Until Bull.

I sniffed. “I won’t.”

“Good girl.” He cleared his throat, like he was choked up as well. “I know I distanced myself from you at times as you got older,” he rasped. “You were just so like your mother, and every year even more so. Your eyes, your voice…your laugh, they were all reminders of her and, yeah, it hurt. That wasn’t fair to you. I think that maybe I made you feel like you weren’t perfect as you were, when you were…God, still are. I love you, pumpkin, and I’m sorry, so damn sorry I made you feel like you weren’t enough.”

Tears welled in my eyes. “I love you, too.” It was all I could manage.

When we finally ended the call, I sat there in my car for the longest time, his words on repeat in my head. I never knew how much I needed to hear that until he said what he did, because that’s exactly how I’d felt for a lot of years. That I wasn’t enough.

It wasn’t my dad’s fault, but I thought that doubt in myself had led to me making some bad decisions, especially where romantic relationships were concerned. I’d been too busy trying to please, searching for love in the wrong places, just wanting someone to love me back, instead of thinking about what I needed.

But this wasn’t a sudden revelation, though. I’d been coming to the same conclusion on my own over the last few months…and yeah, being with Bull had helped me see it.

But right then, it finally all just clicked.

Somehow, I got it together to drive to work.

I thought Logan might try to convince me to listen to him again, but I didn’t have to worry. He didn’t. He did his work and I did mine. Probably a good thing, I was still so raw after my conversation with my dad. I felt his gaze on me, though, hot and intense.