Page 91 of Best Kept Secret

“My guess is he’d do anything to make it up to you—whatever it is.”

So he hadn’t told Alice all the details, then. Did he still feel embarrassed and ashamed to tell people about Annie? On the other hand, why should he have to feel that way? She’d been grappling with the question all weekend.

“Forgiveness is a hard thing to give,” Alice said. “But when you love someone…”

“I never said anything about love.”

“You didn’t have to,” she said softly.

“I appreciate the advice, but I don’t think it’s going to work out for us.”

“I’m sorry to hear that.”

Me too.

“Just do me a favor,” Alice said.

“What is it?”

“Ask yourself if you’ll be happy without him. That’s what I did whenever I got fed up with Freddie. And you know what? I couldn’t do it. I knew I’d be happier staying with him, and I’m so glad I did.”

Alice didn’t wait for a response. She simply slipped inside her apartment and shut the door, leaving Kelsey alone in the dark.

Soon Kelsey was lying in bed, feeling exhausted but not sleeping, and ruminating over Alice’s question. Could she be happy without Hudson? If they stayed together, what would their future look like? She adored Annie, but she’d be stuck with Sonia too. Could she handle that?

Everyone in their age group had a history of past relationships. That had never been an issue before, but this was different. She’d be forced to interact with Sonia because of Annie. Hudson claimed he hadn’t loved Sonia, but did she believe him? At this point, she wasn’t sure what to believe.

She sighed and curled into a tight ball. It was hard to believe that just yesterday she’d been curled up with Hudson—in his arms, in his bed, and at the pool. She’d been looking forward to spending another day and night with him and seeing Annie.

An image of the sweet little girl in her patriotic dress and matching sunhat sprang to mind. Kelsey hadn’t even known her that long, but she felt a pang of regret about not seeing or holding her again. She’d loved going shopping for her, feeding her, and gazing into her big blue eyes. She imagined her as a toddler, walking around on wobbly legs, and then school-aged, when she went off to kindergarten for the first time. Kelsey wasn’t a mother yet, but she already felt a sense of pride for all that Annie would accomplish.

Then she pictured Annie as a teenager and crinkled up her nose. She’d been hell on wheels as a teen, her hormones taking her on a rollercoaster ride of confusing emotions. At least she wouldn’t have to deal with that. Of course, it would be good practice for when she had her own child someday.

Admittedly, she’d thought about having a child with Hudson. She’d imagined what their baby might look like with her dark hair and his hazel eyes. After seeing him with Annie, she knew he’d be a good father, but she hadn’t expected that he already was one.

Sighing, she glanced at the clock on the bedside table and saw it was getting late. At least work would provide a distraction tomorrow, assuming she’d be able to get out of bed. It was also comforting that Stacy would be back soon. She couldn’t wait to find out how things went with Nick’s parents, and she needed to talk to her about Hudson.

Nobody understood her better than Stacy, and she’d be able to help her put everything in perspective. In the meantime, she’d take Jenna’s advice and let him sweat it out a little longer. In her opinion, it was a fair punishment for what he’d put her through. Finally exhaustion took over, and she fell into a deep sleep.

She felt slightly better the next morning thanks to a decent night’s rest and a considerable amount of coffee. She delved into her work, feeling more focused than she’d been since she’d started dating Hudson. Hudson. No. Don’t think about him. But it was almost impossible not to, especially when her nosy coworker Ruth, from across the aisle, said, “Are you okay?”

“Yes, why?”

Ruth shrugged. “You just seem awfully quiet.”

This from the woman who’d frowned at her when she’d laughed at Hudson’s text messages. Go figure.

“Just trying to get through the usual Monday stuff,” Kelsey said. Then she turned away and went back to work. Ruth must not have bought it, though, because Kelsey caught her staring at her on and off throughout the day.

She managed to push (shove was more like it) Hudson from her mind until she got home later and the silence set in again. Her phone remained quiet, and there were no knocks on her door, not even from Alice, who sometimes dropped by to chat. She passed the time before bed indulging in self-care, luxuriating in a warm bubble bath and repainting her nails. She also drank a glass of wine, thinking it would help her sleep, which, thankfully, it did.

Finally it was Tuesday afternoon, and she and Stacy were sitting down to lunch at their favorite Thai food restaurant. By now, she was dying to tell Stacy about Hudson, but first she asked about her trip.

“So, how were Nick’s parents?”

“Wonderful, just like him. He looks just like his dad, and his mom was really sweet.”

“I still can’t believe he’s related to Fran,” Kelsey said, scooping up some shrimp and rice.