Page 102 of Shifted Desire

He huffs out a weak laugh. “No, not a serial killer. Or a murder of any kind. But⁠—”

Shaking my head, I place a finger against his lips. “No buts. If you say the issue isn’t about not trusting me, then prove it. Trust me with whatever is eating you up inside. Trust that I can hold space for that pain and still want you.”

Nathan kisses my finger, helping to soothe away the rising ache in my chest. “Okay.”

I pull my hand away from his lips, placing it on his thigh to reassure him.

“I… I had a partner, a long time ago. Vanessa. Things were getting serious, and she asked me to show her what I was like in my werewolf form. Said it turned her on thinking about me like that. I’ve never liked my curse. For something that was meant to bring me closer to my family, it only made the divide and disappointment on their end deeper. So I was reluctant to⁠—”

Alarms go off in my mind, and I can’t help interrupting. “Wait, back up. What’s that about the curse and your family?”

“Oh.” Nathan looks away, clearly embarrassed. “As you know, I’m adopted. My parents are wolf shifters. When my mom got pregnant with their ‘miracle baby’, I was even more the odd man out, so they decided it would help me fit in better with their world if I ‘converted’, so to speak. That’s why I became a werewolf.”

He speaks matter-of-factly, like he’s delivering a presentation on the key points of some pitch instead of talking about his childhood. About the abuse he endured.

My hands tremble with rage. “How old were you?”

“It was a few weeks before my sixteenth birthday,” he says blandly. “Guess they thought it would be a better sweet sixteen present than a new car.”

“What the fuck?”

He forces a laugh. “I know. I would’ve definitely preferred the car.”

“Nathan, I’m so, so sorry. That’s inexcusable.” Bile rises in my throat as I imagine a not even sixteen-year-old child version of Nathan being coerced into taking on a werewolf curse. Of not being able to consent to such a life-altering decision, then forced to deal with the aftermath on his own. Because it’s clear that he didn’t receive any support after he was irrevocably altered.

He shrugs. “It is what it is.”

“What it is is fucking child abuse.”

He frowns at my reaction. “It’s not…” His throat works after he trails off. “They thought they were helping me. My parents gave me everything. I’d be nothing without them.”

“Fuck that, maybe you wouldn’t be absurdly rich, but you’d still be you. And you’re worth everything. Not just to me, but to my family.” I cup the sides of his face. “Please tell me you know that.”

“I…” He smiles softly, like my angry adamance pleases him. “I guess I do now.”

“You’re my favorite person.” I press a soft kiss on his lips.

“You’re my favorite everything,” he murmurs back, eyes shining.

“If I ever meet your parents, I’m going to hex them.”

Nathan chuckles. “I thought you didn’t have any magic like that.”

“I’ll fucking figure it out,” I grumble.

He kisses me again, smiling against my mouth. “My fierce little devil.”

Nathan sighs when our lips part. “That’s not even why I don’t want to transform.”

I grimace. “Sorry, I know I interrupted. Please continue. There was a woman, Vanessa—sounds right off the bat like a terrible person—and she got hot thinking about banging you as a werewolf.”

Nathan chuckles at my summary. “Right. So we tried it. When I’m transformed, I don’t completely lose my senses. My thoughts are more bestial, but I’m still there. Most of the time. So I thought…”

I lace my fingers with his and give his hand a squeeze.

“I thought from what I experienced she enjoyed it. So we did it a few more times until she broke down sobbing after one full moon and told me she couldn’t stand being with a monster like me. That I was too rough, and I hurt her, and I…fuck, she said she didn’t actually want to do any of it, but was scared I’d get angry and violent.”

The shame pouring off him is so palpable I can taste it in the air.