Page 31 of Westbound Awakening

Before she could take a step, he swung her around and brought her against his hard chest with such force she feared they'd topple over. Then his lips covered hers with a desperation that took her breath away.

She wrapped her arms around his waist and pulled him even closer returning his kiss with matched emotions. How she'd missed him, his touch, his warmth during those nights in the back of the wagon.

His mouth moved over hers, and she parted her lips to allow him better access. At once, their tongues automatically twisted around the other.

Mae didn't realize they'd moved into his room until the soft sound of the door closing behind her sounded. The need to be alone with him, to not share any part of who John McClain was, overruled all common sense.

A thought took root in her mind. This was exactly what she needed right now and she made up her mind.

She'd not leave this room tonight.

Then his lips began a lazy trail down to her throat, Mae threw her head back to allow him more access.

"John." The breathless exclamation intermingled with the sounds of their heavy breathing. Her fingers combed into his hair, and she held him in place with one hand while maintaining a hold on his shoulder with the other.

"I want you," John rasped out, his hands slid down her back to cup her derriere and he pushed his thickness into her accentuating the request. "Let me have you Mae."

How could she deny him? She'd already made the decision and the reply was easy.

"Yes." Mae's answer came like a deep moan followed by a sharp intake of breath when he managed to expose her breasts and began to lap at one while his fingers play with the other. Sensations slammed into her, and she could just barely keep upright. Yet she pulled her fingers through his hair in encouragement, desperate for him not to stop.

John growled and pushed her back onto his bed, falling with her to land on top of her.

His weight brought back memories of their time together on the trail. He smelled of outdoors and rain, his scent igniting her further and she pulled at his shirt needing to touch his skin. Finally when the garment came loose from his pants, she ran her fingers under it running her palms across his broad back and then across the expanse of his chest. All the while, his darkened eyes bore into hers as he allowed her free access to his body.

He'd suppressed the desire for Mae far too long, and now with her in his bed, John was not going to allow the enticing woman out of it until he claimed her. To hell with the repercussions he'd have to face tomorrow.

The fiery trail her fingers left across his skin only added fuel to the already tenuous hold on his urges, and John pressed himself against her center to find her reciprocating with an upward thrust of her hips.

Fearing he was too heavy, he rolled onto his back so that she lay over him. She peered down at him, her long blonde hair a tangled mess, and he took pride in being responsible for her disheveled appearance. He took her swollen lips once again and ran his fingers through the silky tresses, loosening them to fall down past her shoulders.

The reverberations of their breathing and the sound of their kissing merged with the rustling of clothing. Mae's skirts and blouse joined his shirt on the floor.

John hesitated to remove his pants, but the decision was taken away when her delft fingers began making short work of the fastenings at his waist. She pushed the garment down past his hips, her gaze trailing behind studying the exposed skin. When moving to where his left leg ended. His heart beat faster and he stayed her hand. Frozen he couldn't move forward, John even stopped breathing, the last breath stuck in his throat.

"I can't"

Breathing began again with gulps, and he moved backward, his hands still holding his pants up and covering the evidence of his arousal. John kept his gaze down to the floor focusing on the strewn clothes.

"I find you totally and completely perfect John," her husky words had the wrong effect. Of course she was just trying to make him feel better, acted as if the fact he was not whole did not matter to sooth his ego. It was all an act for his sake, and he was not convinced. Perhaps she did want him at the moment, and he attempted to take a step forward, but could not. Finally he was able to swallow past the constriction in his throat and he looked at her.

Her face although still flushed now held nothing but tenderness and it made him feel even less worthy of her. "Come here John. Nothing has to happen between us if you are not ready, but please come back to me." She'd pulled the blanket over herself, and he hated he could no longer see her perfect body.

John released a slow exhalation as he neared the bed and lay back onto it.

On her side, she rested her head on her hand, her gaze flickering to him and then around the room. "This is my first time in this bed."

His gaze traveled to her parted lips. "I've wanted you since that day. The day I walked you home."

"The day you hurried off without looking back?" Her lips curved upward and she slid her fingers over his shoulder. "I remember the day."

"I want to kiss you again Mae."

Her eyes locked onto his, and she leaned forward. "Then kiss me John."

Their lips joined again with him, not allowing any thought to linger on the fact he was not a whole man. With her right now in his bed, a luckier more complete man did not exist. He pulled her over him ensuring the blankets remained in place and held her close.

John leaned his forehead against hers, the whispers of her breathing fanning across his face. "I'm sorry. "