Page 35 of Prime Time Romance

He looks up at the sound of my voice.

“What is wrong with me?” He gets to his feet, throwing the stick to the ground.

“Yes. What was that? You just stormed off.”

He crosses his arms. “What are you doing, Brynn?”

I hold up my hands, wondering why it isn’t obvious. “I’m checking to see if you’re okay.”

He shakes his head. “No. I mean, what are you doing tonight? What was that weird game you were playing?”

“I’m not playing anything.”

He takes a step forward, his eyes pinning me. “I’m not stupid. You were using me to make him jealous.”

“I was not…I didn’t…”

“That is what you actually want, isn’t it?” He takes a step closer. “To date Mr. Dreamy Blue Eyes? Fall in love?”

My gut wants to brush him off with some noncommittal comment, like They’re more of a seafoam color, but I can’t get that out, nor can I get out the actual reason.

Josh shakes his head as if he knows an answer isn’t coming and starts to walk off again.

“Okay, okay,” I call after him. “Fine. I got to thinking about it more, and maybe we should give Sloan the ending she deserves.”

“Unbelievable.” Josh scoffs and keeps walking, but he doesn’t get it. He doesn’t understand.

“Please, Josh.” My voice cracks, and this time he does stop. “It’s really important.”

I can see the rise and fall of his back as he breathes, but he doesn’t turn around. “Why?” he finally says.

“Why what?”

“Why is it so important?”

I don’t know what else he wants to hear.

I have many reasons, most of which I’ve barely admitted to feeling, let alone said out loud.

That Sloan deserved better. That she gave everything to Spencer, and he just walked away without a second thought. Without ever looking back.

Josh grows impatient and starts to walk away again.

“It’s for me too,” I call after him. “I need this, Josh.”

I don’t know why that came out. But as I turn the words over again in my head for a second time, I realize how true they are.

“This will probably come as a shock,” I continue, “but my life hasn’t exactly been going how I wanted it to.” My voice wavers, and I consider leaving it there for a moment, but the rest rushes out before I can stop it. “I thought I found my person. But we never made it to the happily-ever-after part. Which means either that he wasn’t the person I was meant to be with in the first place or that everything we’ve been told about love is complete and total crap. Because if that’s the case, you can find your soulmate, your perfect other half, and he can wake up one day and decide, Sorry. I changed my mind. This just isn’t for me anymore.”

Josh turns slowly back around, but as his eyes find mine, I chicken out and drop my gaze to the hollowed log at his feet. “And although I’m still a little jaded when it comes to love,” I continue, “I’m not quite ready to start believing that it’s all hopeless.” I finally look over at him again. “And that’s where Sloan comes in. Spencer is her guy. He always has been. If love doesn’t work out for them, in a place like this, where everything works out exactly as it’s meant to, well, then the rest of us are doomed.”

I finally find the courage to meet Josh’s eyes, but now his face is so unreadable that I immediately regret telling him all of this.

“Wow. That became much more of a monologue than I intended.” I make a lame attempt at making my voice light. “Sorry for the rant. I’m being stupid, I know.”

He takes a step toward me. “You’re not being stupid at all.”

His voice is low and soft, and his eyes are so kind as he reaches out his hand, as if he’s going to pull me into a hug, but then stops, letting his hand fall to his side.