Page 11 of Hard as Steel

Too many times to count, Krystof looked Steel’s way. Each and every time, he was struck anew Steel was with him. When he had driven past Steel, wondering if Steel headed his way, Krystof had turned around so damn fast, he was lucky he didn’t wreck. While he had decided to let go, he wasn’t strong enough to reject any olive branch Steel extended.

“Let’s take Buttercup home and grab some lunch.”

There was no way in hell Krystof would turn down the offer. “Sounds wonderful.” He didn’t ask where they were eating or a single detail at all. Krystof was just happy to be there.

By the time they pulled into the driveway of Steel’s massive house, Buttercup was worn out. She trotted straight to a doggy bed in the living room and dragged it into the mudroom the moment they came through the door.

“You have a beautiful home.” Krystof wouldn’t admit, even under torture, how many times he had driven past.

Steel flashed him a smile. “You’ve seen the outside several times. Would you like to see the rest?”

Heat rushed to Krystof’s face.

Steel chuckled. It was a low, sexy sound that rumbled from his chest.

Krystof had to stop his eyes from closing in pleasure.

“I work in security, Kryssy. You know I’m good.”

His throat swelled. He hadn’t heard Steel say that name in years. It had always been Steel’s mixture of Krystof and classy. The pet name killed Krystof’s embarrassment. “Yeah, I know you’re the best.” He couldn’t have stopped the innuendo if he tried. When Steel and he had started out, they had been equally inexperienced. They had learned each other's bodies together. By the end, Steel could get him off in less than a minute, unless he chose to make Krystof suffer. Those nights were amazing too.

Steel either didn’t pick up on Krystof’s flirting, or he chose to ignore it. He motioned toward the hallway. “Let’s start the tour.” Together they wandered through the house with Steel showing him all the rooms. There were some he simply waved toward as they passed, explaining they were guest bedrooms. There were way more than Krystof expected.

“You have a lot of spare bedrooms for one person.”

Steel paused outside a doorway and faced him. “At first, I wanted you to see I didn’t need you if you ever looked me up. Then I ended up needing the space. I throw two yearly get-togethers for all my employees across the country. After I fly them here, they can choose to get a hotel room or stay with me. Most usually stay here so they can get plastered and stumble to their rooms.”

“I’ve always known you don’t need me.” Krystof didn’t know why he couldn’t simply let that point pass without comment. But Krystof obviously hadn’t said a lot of the things he should have, and he might not get the chance again. “When I met you, you had driven yourself all the way across the country in that beat-up pickup with nothing but a few bags and Quince. You immediately landed a huge contract and steady client for Quince. I’ve always been so unbelievably proud of you, and I’ve always known you would end up having every dream come true. You’re too amazing to fail.”

Steel didn’t blink or look away. His intensity had always been almost more than Krystof could handle. There were laugh lines at the corners of his eyes now, and gray peppered his hair. But time hadn’t diminished a single damn thing about him, and Krystof still felt him just as much as he had when they had both been too young to be so grown. At most men’s partying age, they had been more like forty-year-olds. Their families had been harsh. They had been forced to be adults their entire lives. Nothing had changed beyond the passage of years.

“I would’ve gone to the ends of the earth with you.”

That punch landed exactly as Steel no doubt hoped. “I know.”

“You meant more to me than anything, including this business I wanted so badly to build.”

Krystof took his punishment. Steel was owed the chance to say all the words. But Krystof also had things to say, that he couldn’t let the chance pass him by. “I never stopped being faithful to you.”

Steel stumbled back a step and leaned against the doorframe as if that was all that kept him upright. His expression screamed disbelief. “Take it back. Say you’re lying.”

Krystof didn’t break eye contact. Whether he believed it or not, Steel knew him. “No.” There was no other answer. He had failed Steel in every other way, but this wasn’t one of them.

Steel winced and stepped inside the bedroom, pacing away from him. He ran his fingers through his hair angrily before returning to face Krystof. The pain written on his face was a dagger to the heart. “No. This one thing has to be a lie.” Steel was truly distraught. He looked on the verge of tears. The air felt too heavy to breathe.

“I’m not sorry. I swore to you that I’d love you until the day I died. We promised each other forever. I died when I walked away from you. The thought of anyone else touching me makes me sick. Sex with anyone else would have broken the last tie I had to you. To my soul, I knew if I ever touched anyone else, that would be letting go. You were owed my celibacy.”

A tear spilled over Steel’s lashes and ran down his cheek. “I can’t say the same to you.”

That hurt way more than expected. He had no right to be angry or devastated the way he was. Krystof had broken them. He had figured Steel went straight to someone else to stop the bleeding. Krystof hadn’t thought they would speak again. Of course Steel deserved all the happiness he could find. Krystof had to live with that. “Yeah. I thought about that way more than can be considered healthy. I spent a lot of nights in bed wondering whose bed you were in. Ana and I had separate bedrooms. I was beyond thankful for that each time I cried myself to sleep, knowing someone else out there would keep all the promises I broke. You owe me nothing.”

To his surprise, Steel exploded. “Goddamn it, Kryssy. How fucking dare you.” He stepped closer, getting in Krystof’s face. “How very fucking dare you. I never once looked into your life. I didn’t know anything about a son. When you said we were over, I gave you what you wanted.”

“No. You gave me what I asked for. A single minute without you is never what I wanted.” Krystof stayed calm. He had to. “It’s okay.”

Steel cupped Krystof’s head between his hands, as if ensuring Krystof couldn’t look away. “It isn’t. Not at all. Why do you think I’m alone? Why do you think I work myself to death and stopped dating a long time ago?”

Krystof’s throat was so swollen, he had a hard time responding. “You’ve been living your dream.”