Page 198 of ClickBack

Her hand flattens against her leg.

“Differently from what?”

“Don’t do that.”

“You brought it up.”

He glances at me. She catches it.

“I’m asking you, Byron.”

“I watched you spend years getting past what happened when you were sixteen. You built something. People respect you. I’d hate to see you become that girl again because a younger man is making you feel good right now.”

Giselle pulls back as if he has reached across the sofa. I start to move, then see her plant her foot more firmly on the floor.

“That girl,” she repeats.

“You know what I mean.”

“I do. I’d forgotten how quickly you could get me there.”

He looks at her hand, still pressed against her leg.

“I’m not trying to hurt you.”

“Then you should be more careful with what you know.”

He opens his mouth. She keeps going.

“Gavin was nineteen. I was sixteen. By the time you met me, I’d heard enough about what kind of girl I was to believe most of it. You didn’t start that.”

I have heard pieces of this. His name is new to me. I stay where I am.

“You loved me,” she says. “You loved Rae. I remember you driving back to her school because she left her project in your car. I remember the nights you sat up with her when I couldn’t stay awake another minute. I haven’t forgotten the good things because we got divorced.”

Byron’s shoulders lower.

“Then why are you talking like I want something bad for you?”

“Because you just told me to be careful I don’t become a girl you think I should still be ashamed of.”

He looks down.

“I thought I was lucky you wanted both of us,” she says. “I loved you, but I was grateful, too. More grateful than I knew how to stop being.”

“I never asked you to be grateful.”

“You knew I was. When things went wrong, I looked for what I hadn’t done. You knew that, too.”

“I can’t be responsible for everything that happened before I met you.”

“I’m talking about what you did after.”

He rubs a hand over his knee. “Then talk about all of it.”

“I’m listening.”

“Everything became your responsibility. Your mother. Rae. Zion. Work. A problem somebody hadn’t even asked you to solve yet. I could be sitting beside you and feel like getting your attention was one more thing you had to do.”