Page 50 of Back To Our Beginning

“But I was your family.”

He gave me a long look. “Maddie, I wanted something different from you than just friendship. Something you weren’t ready for. I needed to leave.”

I wanted to cry. Beau must have seen it.

“Hey. I found a home. It was a good thing for me. Really good. I don’t regret it one bit… Well, maybe a little.”

“What do you regret?”

“Sometimes I wish I could have done more.” He picked up his scone and took a bite. I looked down at mine and realized I hadn’t eaten any. I took a bite, then washed it down with my drink. I waited for Beau to say something more. He didn’t, so I prodded.

“What do you mean you wished you could have done more?”

“My team was in Chad once. A small village outside of N’Djamena. We weren’t even on an actual mission, just recon and recovery. There were kids in the village with bloated bellies and hollow eyes. One little boy came up to me and asked if I had rice. Just rice. Not candy. Not toys. Rice. It broke my heart. It broke all our hearts.” His face was suffused with pain. “I work with the best men imaginable. I couldn’t forget him. Still can’t.”

He looked down at his coffee like it held the memory.

“We gave the kid and the others everything we had. Our MREs, protein bars, raisins, granola. Everything. We knew we were going to be picked up in two days. We were going to be good.” His eyes met mine, soft and shining. “It felt like we were trying to dig them out of a sandstorm with our bare hands.”

He was still the Beau I remembered. I told him so.

“That’s why I have to figure this out. This is more than a maybe. This seems solid. Almost like it’s meant to be, Maddie. Do you feel it?”

I nodded.

But to me, it felt like everything.

It was going to kill me when he left.

Chapter Thirteen

I walked into Maverick’s Bar and Grill just after ten in the morning.

The place was still half-asleep, which was perfect. The kitchen was banging around behind the closed service window, and the scent of grilled onions was starting to mix with stale beer and coffee. Bon Jovi hummed low through the speakers and only three other tables were occupied. Just as I’d hoped, Kai and I would have plenty of privacy.

When I spotted Kai, he was tucked into a back corner booth, and of course, the bastard had taken the seat that faced the bar.

Asshole.

I raised my eyebrow as I slid into the booth.

He smirked. “You’re late. First one here picks their seat.”

“I’m not late. You’re early.”

“That makes me the smart brother.”

I grunted and flagged the waitress down with a nod. When she arrived, I ordered strong coffee, black.

Kai lifted his glass of water. “You look like shit.”

“Didn’t get much sleep,” I admitted.

“Maddie keep you up all night with one of her TED Talks on social justice.”

“Fuck off.”

He chuckled. “Kidding. Kind of. Besides the bags under your eyes, you’re looking good. I even saw you smile at the waitress… when you were through grunting out your order.”