Page 67 of Her Noble Protector

“Good to know.”

He left her and then she heard him flip the pancake. She continued to sit there, wondering what they were going to be talking about today. Wondering what she was going to do now. It was going to take a while before she would be back to her fighting weight to go leading adventures up in Alaska; those were the toughest. Maybe taking on a second-in-command position on some tours in Wyoming or something; she should be able to pull that off.

That’s pretty much all that was left open to her now that all of her hopes of finding family in Mexico had turned to ash. But even doing that kind of light work was still going to be a bit much. She would probably need at least six weeks to get her strength back up after letting herself fall to shit like she had after Mexico.

“That was a long-assed sigh,” Raiden said as he slipped a plate of pancakes in front of her.

Lisa looked up at him but he was gone, then he came right back with butter and syrup.

“What about your food?” she asked.

“I ate earlier. You’re the one who slept in.”

Lisa nodded, then started buttering her pancakes.

“What was that sigh for?”

“Just trying to figure out my next steps. Need to call Paula and find out when I can get back to work. The pity party is at an end, but I’m going to need to get back into shape.”

Raiden sat down next to her, his glass of orange juice hitting the table beside her glass of milk. “Lisa, don’t you think you might be running just a little too fast?” Raiden asked conversationally.

She shook her head, avoiding his eyes as she took her first bite of pancake.

“You weren’t doing so well when I got here six days ago,” he said carefully.

“I was a damned mess,” she said in between bites. “Isn’t that what you mean?” Again she didn’t look at him.

“Yes. That’s what I mean. I don’t want to negate the huge strides you’ve made. But fuck, woman, two of those six days you were kidnapped. I don’t think you should be mapping out your next career move.”

This time her eyes shot to his. He was not sounding happy. He didn’t look happy either.

“Raiden, this is who I am. This is always who’ve I’ve been. I get knocked down and I get up again. That’s life. You just keep on, keeping on.”

“I don’t care how many damn song lyrics you throw at me, Lisa, this is the real world. Just because you feel good for a couple of days, doesn’t mean you’re good. What’s more, the reason you’re feeling good is that you’ve had people like me and Cami here to support you.”

Lisa set down her fork and picked up her milk. She needed its calming effects to coat the sour feelings in her gut that Raiden’s words had conjured up. She looked down at her plate. “I’m going to be fine. I appreciate the help. I do. But I’m going to be fine. You can go home now.”

Lisa watched as her plate of pancakes was pulled out from under her nose and Raiden put his fingers under her chin and tipped it up to him. “If you think I’m going home and leaving you here after what we’ve gone through the last six days, you haven’t been paying attention.”

Her stomach twisted. She needed more milk. Maybe some Pepto Bismol. Anything that would ratchet down the fluttery feeling flying through her insides.

“Raiden, just say whatever it is you have to say outright, because it’s been a long six days, and even though you can read my mind, I can’t read yours.”

“Give me your hand.” He held out his hand, palm up. It was big and strong and she wanted to hold it, but she was scared. “Honey, give me your hand,” his voice was low and coaxing.

Lisa put her left hand, palm down, into his. He laced their fingers together. “I told you that you’re special to me, remember that? I said it right outside there, on the patio. Do you remember that conversation?”

She did remember. That conversation was burned into her soul. She nodded.

“Eventually my leave is going to be over, and I’m not going to let you live here in your house alone. I want you near me. Do you understand?”

She shook her head. She really didn’t understand him.

“Lisa, I’m thirty-three years old. I’ve never been married. Never lived with a woman. Had one long-term relationship that lasted eighteen months, but I knew she wasn’t the one. I always said that if I ever found ‘the one’, I was going to do my damndest to make her mine.”

Lisa jerked at her hand, trying to rip it out of Raiden’s hold, but he didn’t let her. What would he think if she told him that she’d never had a single long-term relationship? That she’d never even made love to a man.

“Raiden, you don’t know about me. Fine, you caught on that life wasn’t roses and lollipops when I was sixteen. But you don’t know how I closed off and became the neurotic woman I am today. I’m twenty-seven and a mess. Not just because of Mexico. I’m not normal. You don’t want a piece of me.”