Page 142 of Scoring Lessons

I couldn’t even deny it—I missed him. A lot.

The day I packed some things in a hurry to get out of his apartment, I’d grabbed one of his hoodies by mistake. It had been a blessing, though, because it was the only thing that was helping me sleep at night.

Daisy was still a bit restless even though weeks had passed, and I knew it was because she missed him, too. He’d become one of her favorite people, and knowing that broke my heart all over again.

The noise of the bar pressed in all at once—the overlapping conversations and the jukebox bleeding into all of it—and it suddenly became too much.

I got off my bar stool and made my escape.

The smell of rain hit my nostrils as soon as the door swung shut behind me. The sound of water hitting the pavement mixing with the thump of the music coming from the bar made my tensed shoulders drop.

Valentina’s place was only a few blocks away, but the rain was getting too strong to walk, so I ended up calling a ride share and texting the girls that I was heading out.

I shouldn’t have gone out in the first place. I wasn’t in the headspace for it, and tonight had been a prime example of that.

The ride was quick, which I was more than grateful for.

When I got out, the rain had turned into a full thunderstorm. My dress was soaked through before I’d made it halfway up the path to the door as I fumbled in my bag to find the keys.

My fingers had just closed around them when someone behind me said, “Olivia, wait.”

His voice was low and gravelly. My body shivered, and it wasn’t because of the cold water that coated my skin.

My breath caught in my throat as I slowly turned and found Wesley. His dark-blond curls were stuck to his forehead, and rain tracked down his jaw, his neck. His beige linen shirt was soaked through as well, clinging to every hard line of his heaving chest.

I frowned in confusion as I looked around. I hadn’t heard another car stop. “How did you⁠—”

“Get here?” He let out a long exhale, still catching his breath. “I got to the bar, and Valentina said you’d just left, and I just…” He shook his head, like he hadn’t stopped to think about it. “I ran here.”

I stayed glued in place, not knowing what to say. Every breath I took hurt, like my heart was reliving our breakup on a loop. His resigned voice. The words that had slashed deep cuts underneath my skin that no one could see. The way I’d lost both the love of my life and my best friend.

Seeing him in passing at work was survivable. I had things to do, places to be, the armor of a busy schedule between us. But this was different. It was real. And we were here, with nowhere to go, and nowhere to be, like the universe was telling me it was time to face the inevitable.

“What are you doing here?” I asked, my voice turning hoarse. My throat tightened as I held back the tears that threatened to escape.

He hesitated for a beat then took a step closer. “I’ve been trying to figure out a way to talk to you for weeks.”

“You can always talk to me,” I said, meaning every word. “You know that.”

He nodded, his jaw tightening, his gaze meeting the cracks of the pavement. “You don’t hate me?”

“No.” I tightened the grip on my purse like it was the only thing keeping me from falling apart. “But sometimes I wish I did,” I added weakly.

I love you too damn much for my own good, was what I wanted to say. You broke my heart, and I still find ways to love you, and I really wish I didn’t.

“That’s fair,” he replied, his voice thick and filled with emotion. “I was looking for you at the bar because I wanted you to be the first to know that I—” He let out a sigh of relief. “I signed a contract extension with the Strikers today. I’m staying in Chicago.”

He took another step closer. I still didn’t dare move.

“And, I don’t know. As soon as everything was said and done, I realized I only wanted to tell you. Because, God, Livvie.” His hands met his hips as he shook his head, like part of him was still trying to come to terms with whatever realization he’d had. “You’re not only the love of my life. You’re also my best friend.” He ran a hand through his wet hair. “And I miss you so goddamn much, it hurts to—to breathe.” One of his hands found his chest, and he took another big exhale. “I can’t survive it anymore.”

The love of my life.

My best friend.

I miss you.

It hurts.