Page 82 of Escape from the Green

We will call you back in when it is time for all the finishing touches.

That was what Drake had told me.

And I really maybe should have been more understanding, but I was going a little stir crazy in the house, stabbing my finger with Aya's spare wooden needle time and time and time again until the tip of it became hardened with a callous I wondered might not ever go away.

"You should put that away," Aya demanded, waving a hand at me. "You need some fresh air. Stretch your legs. Just because the men are being, well, men, doesn't mean you can't go and explore on your own, get some exercise, clear your head. The mending will be here when you get back. The snow is melting, you know. Whole parts of the ground have grass peeking through. I even saw a crocus in the square. Spring is on its way. It will be here before we know it. Here," she added, reaching for a little snack pouch that she made filled with nuts, seeds, dried fruits, and some chewy roots, and kept in a large basket to throw in pockets or bags when you were on your way out. "Take this. Go have some fun."

I took the pouch, leaning in to kiss her cheek in a way that had become second nature to me. Me. Someone who never knew affection from a mother, never knew how to give affection to a mother.

It was a gift I don't think Drake - or his family - truly understood the significance of.

It meant the world to me.

To have warmth and affection and kindness after a life of cold and distance and cruelty.

It managed to pierce through the bad mood that had been hanging over me for the past few days.

"Take your paper and pen," she suggested. "Write your letters. The time will be coming soon for you two to take your trip out into the other realm."

It had been a sore subject since Drake and I had finally been summoned by the elders to be exhaustively questioned until my mind started to feel thick as molasses, hard to wade through.

They were angry at us for demanding to be allowed to go back into the other realm every season.

It is simply not done.

That was Borena, the oldest lady elder with the disapproving eyes. I had a sneaking suspicion - though never spoke it aloud out of respect - that she was prejudiced toward me because I wasn't Draca. After so many generations without anyone being allowed to cross the veil, I could see how it would easily happen. Especially since all the legends that I had heard - the ones that had been passed around the fire pit in town like old, beloved stories - painted my kind in the ugliest, harshest of lights, highlighting all our flaws and imperfections, amplifying them, until we came off as the wickedest of monsters with no redeeming qualities at all.

The only thing that seemed to help us - aside from having Kieran on the council to begin with, was the fact that my connections went straight back to the Seelie Court. Apparently, Borena had a connection with the Light Queen - Ang - from back when they were young. She liked the idea that I had connections there, especially after hearing how twisted Cass' desire for power had become. There seemed to be this unspoken understanding. Something is coming. We need to be prepared.

Just because their veil had stood all this time didn't mean it would continue to do so. It didn't mean that there weren't witches and mages in both courts who could undo the spell, who could rip their sanctuary away from them.

If something was coming, it was best to be aware of it, to make smart, strategic connections.

Like mine with Jasper who was with Cece who was daughter to the heir apparent, who was granddaughter to the sitting Queen.

Being the kind of fae they were, the Draca would never side with the Dark, would never choose that side to fight on.

So using me to gain protection was smart for them.

And the only reason we were going to be allowed to head back out of the veil in about a week and a half when the rest of the Draca were busy celebrating Ostara with a huge feast I found myself somewhat sad at the thought of missing.

But, I reminded myself as I walked down the path, offering smiles to those I knew and those who were still strangers to me alike, we would get to see Sal and Smoky again.

Smoky and I had spoken a lot on the walk back to Drake's ancestral land, had found an odd sort of connection given how different we were. I think both of us were craving a connection with other women, had been starved of one that was genuine and friendly all our lives. It made it easier to look past our very different outlooks on life.

She needed a friend.

And even though I was quickly acquiring ones in my new home, I wanted to keep her as close as I possibly could, I wanted to be for her what these men and women were starting to become to me. Something like a makeshift family. Something Smoky had never had for herself.

I hoped Sal was looking out for her as he said he would. I hoped he didn't give up, that he would be able to someday get her to see why they could and would work as a pair, that he had no interest in taming her, just enjoying her. That she could trust someone else, learn to love someone, maybe start a family of her own, give the next generation something she hadn't been able to have.

I made my way to a clearing lined with rocks situated in a way that made it clear this was a gathering space when the weather allowed for it. Not too far off, I could hear the icy crash of the waterfall I was longing to see.

Sitting down, I pulled out my notepad, staring at the blank page, unsure what to say. I had written a note already about how I left home, about why, about living in the human realm, about Cass almost finding me there, what his real plans for me were. Then I had sat down one of the nights on the journey to Drake's land to explain that plan as well. It was a messy couple of pages full of scribbled out words, my worry and insecurity clear in every sentence.

But how was I supposed to describe this? This feeling of family? Of love? Of - dare I even think it - happiness? How does one put that into words.

I took a deep breath, deciding not to overthink it, that anything happy would be a welcome passage after so many negative ones. Jasper and Jade would be glad to know I had managed to find something good after a long, hard winter.