Page 12 of Gaze

I_BiT3: How are you today

L3NS_72: No complaints, you?

I notice she rarely answers my questions unless it’s in her interests to do so. I try to push those thoughts out of my head. Rational thought comes second to the thrill I get from her attention.

I_BiT3: How's your leg?

L3NS_72: Mmmm- hurts a little

I_BiT3: And your stomach?

I paused for a moment, mulling over the question before I realize I hadn’t eaten since, well I couldn’t remember when. Probably when Lisa was here, when was that again? Yesterday, the day before? I don't remember feeling hungry. The heat was so oppressive it sapped my interest in food away.

L3NS_72: Empty as a football

I_BiT3: And your love life?

L3NS_72: Not too active

Was that a lie? Lisa was mad at me, sure, but we were still together. It wasn’t that I hadn’t mentioned Lisa, more the situation hadn’t come up. It was all harmless flirting, nothing had happened. Nothing could happen - she was wherever she was and I was trapped in this apartment. Besides I had watched Lisa flirt and charm many a person over the years at functions and work events I was covering.

I_BiT3: I've been thinking about that picture you won’t send me

L3NS_72: What about it?

I_BiT3: If I send you something, do you promise to use it?

L3NS_72: What? I can't make a promise just like that

I_BiT3: Coward

I let the words hang on the screen for a minute; I can't deny that talking to Bite excites me. That I don't want to receive more gifts. Not that I have used the one she had already sent - it was still sitting on my desk in the box, unsure of where to put it. Unsure of what using it really meant.

L3NS_72: you have my address; I can't stop you

I_BiT3: that's permission

I_BiT3: good girl

And with that she was gone again. My pussy flared at the last two words on the screen. ‘Good girl’ never had anyone spoken to me like that before, I didn't know it was something I needed - something I liked. Something that gave me such a physical reaction.

Two little words, and a whole lot of promise.

I look over at the computer screen again, the blue glow illuminating the room now the sun has set. Alone once more in my thoughts I turn off the machine and direct my attention back to the window.

chapter

fourteen

Lisa is in my apartment again; I can't really remember her arriving. I was sleeping in the chair, the camera long dead after I left it on overnight. My joints stiff and aching again. I must have been there all night.

The night before I fell asleep at the computer talking to Bite, when I woke up still logged in, my head resting in my arms on the desk. She had been teasing me, testing me. Growing flirtier with each message we exchanged. I felt like a schoolgirl with a crush, desperate for their attention and willing to do anything to get it.

Now I keep my eyes on the windows opposite, it’s midafternoon and mid-week - most people are out at work so it’s all quiet, but I can't help myself. My camera is still set up next to me, a fresh battery ready to go in case I need a closer look at anything.

I steal a look at Lisa in the window reflection. Today she is wearing jeans, high waisted as is the fashion and a baggy white linen shirt, it's probably worth more than a month's rent for one of these tenements. It hangs off her shoulder artfully, faking effortlessness but I know she has probably spent hours with a mirror perfecting it.

She sees me looking out the window, our eyes lock in the reflection and I can see she is wounded that I haven’t paid her any attention yet.