Page 54 of Road to Absolution

Clutching her face again so I could see her beauty, inside and out, I stared and adored my wife, while telling Diesel, “It’s not your hearts I worry about or doubt. If me doing this puts any ounce of fear in your—our enemies, then I have to try.”

Lilah cried, “Mav—” but I silenced her with a kiss that I hoped she sensed was boundless.

I guess I got lost in the kiss, too, because the next thing I knew, Knuckles was in the room, and Diesel’s cell phone was on speaker. He asked, “All my officers present?”

I stared at Lilah as I listened to a bunch of responded affirmatives.

Knuckles, the club’s Secretary, also said, “Here.”

Into his phone, Diesel said, “I’ll explain later, but I need a vote. I’m wanting to bring in a new wolf.”

“Boss, you okay?” asked someone over the phone.

“Yeah. Just listen up. Do any of you have an objection to Maverick Hutton?”

There was silence… then, “Here, it’s a unanimous vote. There?”

Diesel and Knuckles raised their hands. “It’s a yes.”

Over the phone, someone said, “Welcome the Boxer Boy for us.”

Diesel hung up and stared at me.

Barely able to keep up with my life and all its jagged twists… I shrugged. “Maybe I’ll look smokin’ on a bike.”

The laughter in the room was needed.

So was Viola’s comment, “I, for one, am already picturing it.”

Attempting to appear relaxed, but failing, I told my wife, “I get another cat scan tomorrow. If my head is clear,” I chuckled, “and the shitter is full, I’m out of here.”

With puffy eyes, she said, “I stay with you.”

I sucked in the tear that had dripped to my lip, then whispered, “I need you to go.”

Viola, knowing there was no changing my mind, started collecting Lilah’s things.

Already regretting my decision, I closed my eyes. “Take her.”

“No,” she groaned, long and hard.

Her brother tried, “Light, it would be safer—”

“No! My husband needs me.”

I did. I do. And I always will. But, in the state I was in, I was no challenge for an intruder. He could kick one of my legs and open delicate skin. I doubted I had the strength to make a fist, much less fight my way free of an attack, if an enemy were so brazen in a hospital.

Simply put, I couldn’t protect my wife.

But now I had a club that could. Even though my ego despised me for it, I let them care for my Lilah.

My hospital gown in her agitated fists, Lilah begged, “Please.”

It felt like when Lilah and I had first moved to college, when I was trying to convince her to follow her father’s advice. John hadn’t wanted us living together so young. Felt school was enough pressure. So, I had to pry her fingers from me so I could go to my own dorm a few blocks away.

Here I was, again trying to convince her to let me go. In college, it had been a mistake. I was hoping this time would be different.

Still clutching her face, I said, “Baby, stop.”