Page 97 of Raging Fires

“And he was a miserable son of a bitch to be around, too,” Asa added. “Worse than you.”

“Way worse than you,” Kowalski agreed. “He couldn’t throw a decent spiral for three weeks.”

“The point is,” Neil said with a glare for his friends. “I got Steph an interview with somebody she couldn’t get for her book.”

“And that was your scheme to get her back?” Jake asked doubtfully.

“Well, no. I did it so I could hang out with her for a while,” Neil said. “And the whole thing turned out to be really painful and awkward. But I think it helped—you know, just because we had to spend time together.”

“Mostly, Claire was the one who fixed it,” Pete put in.

“True,” Neil admitted.

“Okay. That’s about all the getting-in-touch-with-our-feelings talk I can take,” Jalyn said, rising to his feet. “I’m starving.”

All the other men gradually drifted off in search of showers and food until only Asa and Jake were left.

“You think any of that would work with Kelli?” Jake asked his friend.

“I don’t know. Maybe. Jalyn has been married a long time. And Mel’s no pushover; she’s tough like Kelli. Couldn’t hurt to try.”

“Yeah, I guess.” Jake crossed his arms behind his head. “Thing is, it wasn’t just a screw-up. It was bigger.” He paused. “I’m not sure Kelli even likes me anymore.”

“What? That’s crazy.”

“She said she wished I was different. Like she doesn’t really like who I am. And I can’t change that.”

“Oh, man, that doesn’t mean anything.” Asa rolled onto his side, propping himself up on his elbow. “People say things like that when they’re mad. Stuff they don’t really mean. Just lashing out, you know. Haven’t you ever said anything bad about Kelli?”

“Yeah.”

“Did you mean it?”

“Sometimes.” Jake’s mouth twitched in a half-smirk. “At least at the time. Most of them, I didn’t. And some—well, she is kinda obsessed with order and way too big on the rules. But those things don’t matter. They’re even sort of cute in a way.”

“See? Kelli did the same thing. She was mad and said something she didn’t really mean. People are always wanting other people to be different even when they’re crazy about them; that’s just human nature. My mom used to ride me all the time about being neater and more studious and all that stuff; didn’t mean she didn’t love me or that she didn’t want me to be her son.”

“Well, sure, but you’re talking about a mother. That’s different.”

Asa rolled his eyes. “We’re talking about women. And love. And you can’t tell me Kelli didn’t love you. Or that you didn’t love her. You two were great together. You were right for each other.”

“That was college.”

“So? Tell me this.” Asa tapped a forefinger on the turf between them. “You think Kelli would have hopped into bed with any guy she had to share that house with?”

“No.” Jake scowled at him. “Of course not. Kelli doesn’t sleep around.”

“Yet she got into bed with you… knowing you’d hurt her before, knowing there was probably no future, knowing it could all come down on her again. And you don’t think she still loves you? You don’t think she trusts you?”

“But I did the same thing,” Jake protested, and Asa gave him a pointed look. “Okay, yeah, I love her. Maybe she still loved me. But it’s already all over. We tried it, and it didn’t work.”

“You had one argument, man. One. She’s too rigid. You’re late a lot. And that makes your marriage over?”

“It’s not just that. It’s the past. There’s been all that anger and hurt and distrust, so much time apart. It’s all so tangled up, I don’t know if we could ever work our way out of it. Maybe… maybe sometimes, you just can’t stay together, no matter how much you love someone.”

Asa made a wordless noise of disgust. “Well, you sure can’t if you don’t even try.”

“You’re saying I didn’t try? That I don’t care?”