Page 40 of Signal No. Us

“You know what your promises used to be worth,” Robby said, not cruel, just honest.

“Fair,” Allan said. “That’s why this time, it’s not just a promise in words. I’ll tell you every day, if that’s okay, while I’m gone. I won’t disappear.”

Robby studied him a long moment, weighing it, weighing all of it, ten years of history and three weeks of careful new trust standing in the same small, dusty room.

“Okay,” he said finally. “But Allan—” he crossed the space between them, resting a paint-stained hand against Allan’s jaw, gentle, deliberate “—come back because you want to, not because you owe it to us. If you want that life more, tell me. I can accept that, even if it hurts. What I can’t accept is you lying to yourself just so I don’t get hurt.”

“I don’t want that life,” Allan said, and meant it, fully, for the first time since the email arrived. “But I need to get clarity on it first, so I’m not always scared that I might regret it.”

“Then let’s make this the actual promise,” Robby said, quieter now, like he’d been building up to it the whole conversation. “If it ever happens again, either of us going quiet, either of us carrying something alone because it feels safer than saying it out loud, we call it out. Both of us. Even if it’s three in the morning. Even if it feels stupid.”

“Both of us,” Allan agreed, and meant it in a way he hadn’t quite been ready to mean it in weeks ago. “We’re both the type to disappear when it gets hard. I know that about myself now. I can’t promise I’ll never want to. I can promise I’ll tell you when I do.”

“Fair,” Robby said, and kissed him once, soft, a promise rather than a goodbye. “Just let me know when you land.”

“Always,” Allan said.

He left the cinema that evening with the mural half-finished behind him, the two painted figures still standing hand in hand under their storm, and for the first time in two weeks, walking away didn’t feel like running.

It felt, finally, like choosing to come back on purpose.

CHAPTER 22

The whole family insisted on seeing him off at the Virac airport, which was less an act of sentiment and more, Allan suspected, a coordinated surveillance operation to make sure he actually got on the plane.

“Eat properly in Manila,” Tita Gemma instructed, pressing a bag of homemade suman into his hands like emergency rations. “Not just fast food.”

“Don’t go trying to impress those Manila people,” Tita Yolanda added. “You’re already good-looking enough here. They’re the ones who should be impressing you.”

“Bring pasalubong or don’t come home,” Ver said, then, catching Cora’s look, amended quickly, “kidding. But okay, pasalubong.”

Cora hung back until last, the rest of the family already drifting toward the gate, and pulled him into a hug that lasted a beat longer than her usual brisk, efficient embraces.

“Remember what I told you,” she said into his shoulder. “Full heart. Whatever the decision.”

“Yes, Ma.”

“And call me when you land. Not just a text. A call.”

“Okay po.”

She pulled back, studying his face one more time with the old assessing frown, then, satisfied by whatever she found there, gave a single clipped nod, her highest available compliment, and let him go.

Robby was the last to say goodbye, standing a little apart from the noise of the family, hands in his pockets, doing a visibly poor job of looking casual about it.

“Three days,” Robby said.

“Three days,” Allan confirmed.

“Tell me when you⁠—”

“Always,” Allan said, cutting off the same worry from a week ago before Robby had to voice it again. “I won’t disappear. Promise.”

Robby exhaled, some of the tension easing out of his shoulders, and closed the distance to kiss him, brief, public, entirely unbothered by the fact that half the BEBES were watching with open, delighted interest a few feet away.

“Take care,” Robby said. “And Allan: whatever you decide, it’s okay. I’ll say this one more time: I want you here, but I want you to be honest with yourself more than I want to be the reason you lie to yourself.”

“Noted, boss,” Allan said. Then, dropping the bit, quieter: “I’m not going there to promise anything. I’m going to find out.”