Page 61 of The One Timer
“Never mind that,” Aunt Bea says. “Emery needs to cash in on whatever she can get out of the man. It’s best for all of us if she catches Chase’s attention and holds it—even if it’s just for a little while.”
“Is that the dress in the box?” Petra says. I’d explained about the dress as part of my job’s compensation. That’s the only way I can explain it to myself in spite of Mrs. W’s insistence that it was a gift.
I nod, feeling guilty and confused and somehow disloyal to my family and Mrs. W at the same time. “Mrs. W insists that I keep it. She says—”
“Can I try it on?” She doesn’t wait for an answer as she goes for the box tucked between the couch and my bureau in the corner of the room and pulls it out.
I take the box from her, remembering what Mrs. W said about how no one else should want to wear the gown after seeing me in it. “Are you sure you want to wear it?”
Petra shoves her hands on her hips and stares at me. “Of course I want to. Why wouldn’t I? I have a post-holiday party or work coming up and this dress will blow everyone away.”
For a split second under her expectant stare, I hold onto the box, hesitating. Then I hand it over.
Because I always share, always give. It’s my automatic first instinct, always. The heat of shame tightens my chest and I force a smile, helping her open the box.
“I’m a little taller than you, but I’m sure it can be altered to fit you.” As I say the words, regret and sadness washes over me for the loss of the dress as she pulls it from the box and rushes into her room.
“This is gorgeous. You bet it’ll fit. I’ll make it fit.”
She didn’t say thank you, but I could hear the gratitude in her excitement.
“She appreciates it, Emery,” Penny says as I stare at the closed bedroom door. “She should have said thank you.”
“I’m sure she forgot in her excitement,” Aunt B says. They both go back to the couch—my bed--to watch television. I get some clothes from my bureau to take a shower and dress in the bathroom, the only room in the small apartment where I have any privacy.
A while ago, I had a pang about moving out and being on my own, thinking I’ll miss them, now I have a pang of impatience to be on my own and away from the crowded space. But neither scenario satisfies whatever longing has settled in me, making me feel vaguely dissatisfied in a way I’ve never felt before, like I’m looking for something that’s not there.
Something I can’t have, like that old dream where I’m searching and calling my father’s name.
Standing naked under the spray of water, my mind turns to Chase—naturally—I smile guiltily, though I’m no nun and there’s no reason I should feel guilt. Is there? Remembering last night stirs a deep flush of pleasure and any sense of dissatisfaction I felt a minute ago disappears.
Maybe Chase is that mysterious something I’m looking for, the something I can’t have. Except I can have him right now. Not forever, but what lasts forever anyway?
Chapter Twenty-One
EMERY
I’m in the kitchen with Gran in the morning when Chase comes down the back stairs. Shock hits me, but unfortunately it doesn’t strike me dumb. “I didn’t expect you to be here.”
Shit. I could bite my tongue off.
He grins. “I came back last night. Unfinished business.”
That’s a mysterious thing to say, but this time I bite my lip firmly and hold my mouth closed.
“I was just going to ask Emery a favor,” Mrs. Whittier says.
“What’s that?” It’s the first I’ve heard of a favor and I’m suspicious.
“I’d like you to come to Chase’s game with me tonight. We’ll take the limousine. It’ll be fun.”
“Come to my game tonight and I’ll give you a ride home. In the morning.” He says it right there in front of his grandmother. My heart stutters and I dart a glance at each of them. I’m not sure what to say besides what the hell?
“That sounds like an offer you shouldn’t refuse,” Gran says.
My eyes go big with mock shock. “Molly O’Malley Whittier, you are a little devil. Are you trying to play matchmaker?”
“What if I am? It’s not the worst thing I’ve done in my life.” She winks, laughing.
