Page 25 of Savage Pakhan

She’s so close, I can see the dark golden hue around her pupil that fades into a beautiful autumn brown.

Losing myself in her will be so easy if I allow myself to fall even just an inch further. I cup her face, my thumb dragging along her cheek, and press our foreheads together. I don’t say a word. There’s no need to speak when the air is charged with all those what ifs.

She feels it too. I know she does.

“We have to get going,” I whisper into the silence.

She nods, grabbing onto my arm.

I press a kiss to her forehead and allow my lips to linger longer than they should. I have to feel her against me somehow. Someway.

The slight taste of her sweat swipes across my bottom lip. There’s an underlying sweetness so her that I want to explore.

“Fuck,” I hiss under my breath and pull away from her completely, gripping the wheel as hard as I can while I look out of the filthy windshield. My cock is straining in my pants. Long, hard, and leaking for her to wrap her hand around me.

She inhales a sharp breath, probably seeing the evidence of what she does to me.

I won’t apologize for it. I won’t act on it, but I won’t apologize either. I can’t help I want her in a way I’ve never wanted anything or anyone else.

I am completely lost in her, I realize.

I’m already so far gone I’m not sure what could bring me back. Not even loyalty to my own son will stop me from loving Mia.

“We need to go,” I state, my voice gruff and strangled from controlling myself. “Try to get some rest. I’ll get us there, okay?”

“Okay,” she agrees with a sleepy voice, her hand resting on my thigh.

I wait for her to move it. Instead, she squeezes my thigh muscle and relaxes again, her hand staying in place.

And my cock is erect, hard and wanting against the inside of my thigh which is only a few inches away from her delicate fingers that I’ve dreamed about wrapping around me.

I tighten my hands on the steering wheel again, focused on the windshield, and I reverse. The sooner we get to the safehouse, the better. I need space. Being this close to her is havoc on my heart.

“Go to sleep, Lyubimaya. Rest. We’ll be there in about an hour.”

She leans across the middle console again and rests her cheek against my shoulder, yawning. Mia shuts her eyes, her long lashes casting a shadow on the tops of her cheek.

I don’t have the heart to push her away. I feel better when she’s close than when she isn’t. This might be all in my head. What if she is doing this because she knows she’s safe with me? What if I tell her I’m in love with her and I have been for a few years now, will she change how she views me?

I rub my temples, the exhausting day causing a throbbing headache. I can’t wait to get to the safehouse, shower, change, and get some rest.

Slamming the car in reverse, I get us to the road, flip on the headlights, and start to drive. I flip on the windshield wipers, swiping away the grim that’s built up. The radio is stuck on one station. A classical jazz that has a lot of static from a weak connection.

I’ll take it. It’s better than nothing. I can’t stand driving in silence.

The roads wind and the trees become denser as we get further away from civilization. The safehouse isn’t really a safehouse for everyone. It’s only for me or Nikolai if we ever need to get away. No one else knows about it.

No one.

So, if someone who isn’t him shows up at my door, someone will be dying for that, but not before I have them dig their own grave. I won’t let anyone ever hurt Mia again.

I don’t care how much blood I need to spill. I don’t care how much pain I inflict. I don’t care if they beg for their lives. Every single person will be met with a bullet between the eyes and dirt weighing down their body ten feet under.

Ten. Not Six.

I don’t chance anyone finding my kills or risk any flooding washing them away.

May every person I’ve killed rest in Hell.