Page 192 of Johnny

safe. And… and…” She sighs. “You know. I think you were right yesterday. It’s all kind of pointless.”

“My wish is kind of vague,” I say, deciding to ignore her hopelessness and bet on my own

misplaced optimism to keep her going tonight. Because I need her focused. She can’t fall apart now.

Not now.

“More of a lifestyle kind of wish,” I continue. “Things are calm and life is easy. No more thoughts

about the Way or the money. You and me and a little house, maybe?”

“God, do you think I’m stupid?”

“What?”

“Just stop, OK? It was a nice night. Pretty fucking romantic, actually. But I get it. You need me and

I need you, and we’re going to show up on that island tomorrow together and hand each other over.

And then? Then it’s just done. OK? They get everything they want and we get nothing but this weird,

opposite-day wish fulfillment that we somehow saved each other and… There’s no wish in the world

that could help us now.”

She’s right, of course. But this doesn’t move us forward and I need us moving forward. So I push

on without her. “A house with a yard. And windows that open. And a dog. Maybe two dogs. Maybe,

one day, a kid.”

“It’s a nice wish,” she says in a low voice. “But it’s stupid to want things you’ll never get.”

“There,” I say, ignoring her as I point up at the sky. “There’s another one. That one’s yours.”

“It doesn’t work that way,” she huffs. “Doesn’t count if I didn’t see it myself.” She’s not even

looking up at the sky. Her eyes are closed and her mouth is frowning.

“It does,” I assure her. “It works any way we want. So I’m giving that wish to you. Take it with

grace, Megan.”

She opens her eyes and stares up at the sky. Says nothing.

“Come on. Just… if we’re gonna lose tomorrow the least we can do is win tonight. Just… play

along with me. Please.”

She frowns, but doesn’t turn her head to look at me. Doesn’t even slide her eyes to the side to catch

me in her peripheral vision. Just says, “I can find my own shooting stars.”

I watch her for a few moments. Just watch her watching the sky. Then look back up and try to keep

the fear inside me at bay. Try to organize all the folders that just came unfiled inside my brain

cabinets. I just need to hold it all together for one more day. Just one more day and then I can do