Page 139 of Whispered Promises

He kisses my hair and leads me out. The walk through the room, outside, and back to our building is a blur. I couldn’t even tell you what the weather’s like, if it’s light, dark, hot, or cold.

The rage has guttered out, and I’m curled up in the corner of my mind, feeling bruised and depleted.

I’m suddenly standing outside my front door with Nate’s hands cupped around my face, his features crinkled as he takes in every tiny detail of me. I can almost feel his mind probing against mine, desperate to get inside and fix things. Fix me.

“Tell me,” he demands, his thumbs brushing against my cheeks.

Softness isn’t natural for him, but it feels like he’s always trying for me. I’ve seen what he’s like with everyone else. I know he’s different with me. But even acknowledging that still doesn’t have me spilling everything out.

I don’t want all my tainted thoughts said out loud, to be given life.

“I’m sorry. I’ve not been great company. It’s been a long day at work, that’s all.”

His eyes narrow. “Something happen at work?”

“Nate, it’s been a long day. I’m tired and need an early night. Can we write off tonight, and tomorrow, I’ll do a better job of functioning as a human being?”

“If you need an early night, okay. But I’m not writing off anything. I want you just as you are, every day.”

“What if…what I am isn’t enough for you? What if you get bored and decide there’s something better out there?”

Any other words are silenced when his mouth meets mine, and his tongue plunges between my lips, probing and claiming. Our teeth clink, and my hands latch onto his shoulders as he crowds me against the wall.

“There’s nothing better than you. You’re it for me. Don’t make me have to keep reminding you,” he growls against my mouth. The terse anger in his words vibrates against me.

“What if I need you to remind me?” Chest heaving against his, I fight against the need to claw the insecurity back.

“Then I’ll do it, because there’s nothing you can say or do that will make me change my mind about us.”

His mouth covers mine again, silencing my insecurities and doubts. It would be irritating if it weren’t for the fact that I crave the contact, the feel of him against me, inside me. His kiss turns almost desperate, but I can feel myself retreating. Pulling away and hiding from his strength and confidence in me, in us.

I’m so fractured, I can’t pull myself out of the recesses of my mind. Can’t shrug off my self-pity and trust his words. It’s not that I don’t believe them, but I need time to let everything feel raw and ugly before I gather the strength to shove it all back in a box and get back up again. I’m not sure how to do all of that right now with him here.

Nate plants another hard kiss on my mouth, then pulls back. “Remember to message. If you need anything, I’ll do it.”

He gives me one last lingering look, then waits for me to go through the door.

It closes behind me, heavy, weighted, and full of inadequacy.

SIXTY

NOAH

“Are we sure this is the right thing to do?” Bry sighs, but I don’t answer him. I’m on the fence about it too. It’s not something I would usually agree to.

But it was either let Max and Nate go alone and potentially do something they’ll regret or go along with it and try to keep things peaceful.

I didn’t see Rosy yesterday. Nate was the only one who did. She didn’t feel up to coming over for dinner. It’s not the first time it’s happened, and we can’t expect her to always want to be with us. But she has been retreating recently, her mind elsewhere and her emotions more clouded.

Whether that means we should be turning up at her workplace after she’s left is too late to question when we’re all piled into Nate’s truck and on our way there.

“How do you know if he’s still going to be there?” Max adds, leaning through the seats to ask Nate.

“Booked a meeting with him. Said I had vacancies, and we need someone to do the hiring. That it had to be him.”

“So you lied to get us in?” Bry groans, shaking his head.

“Didn’t say I’d take people on. Just that I’m looking. I can look.” He dismisses his worry with a hand. “None of you saw her last night. She was hurt and breaking. They can’t make her feel like that.”