Page 92 of His Untoward Hate

“Do you know you’re the only person who makes me nervous?” Sky said softly behind him; his voice was so gentle. “I can’t take this anymore, Jude…” he trailed off. “I’m so scared…”

Jude was completely speechless. His mind had gone blank, unable to form a single coherent thought. From Sky’s trembling words and his crying, something Jude had never witnessed even once before—he knew this was real.

“I’m so terrified of losing you, so please don’t ever think about leaving me…” Sky pleaded, his voice cracking. “I know I’ve been a complete asshole. I know I don’t deserve you. But I’m begging you, please don’t think about dying. Don’t think about suicide or any kind of death. I can’t afford to lose you, and I don’t know what I’d do if that ever happened…”

It was the first time Sky had ever begged anyone, and Jude could feel the sincerity in every word.

“I’ve always known I was a coward,” Sky continued. “Hating you was the only way I knew how to stop myself from falling for you.”

The confession hit Jude like a bolt of lightning. He was dumbfounded, convinced for a moment that this had to be another one of Sky’s cruel jokes.

But it was not.

Sky loosened his hold slightly, though he kept his forehead pressed against Jude’s shoulder, refusing to let go.

“But I can’t keep carrying these feelings anymore, Jude,” he whispered. “They’ve been torturing me for more than five years, and I can’t hide them any longer…”

Sky fell silent for a moment, summoning the courage to reveal the truth he had kept hidden for years.

“I hated you because I loved you.”

Suddenly, Jude’s world stopped. Hearing those words coming from his number one enemy felt unbelievable. Despite his high temperature, it felt like he was being dumped with a bucket of ice from what he heard.

“And no matter how hard I try, my heart keeps going back to you. My heart keeps longing for you. My heart keeps looking for you. My heart keeps beating ferociously whenever you are near me. My heart jumps for joy whenever I see you. My heart is home with you, Jude…” Jude felt him swallow hard. “And all my life, I’ve never felt this way about anyone else.”

35

No matter how hard Jude tried to process Sky’s words, his mind refused to accept the confession he had just heard. The revelation of Sky’s feelings seemed too impossible, too unreal for his brain to comprehend. Disbelief and confusion swirled inside him. After all, this was Sky Granger.

With his forehead resting against Jude’s shoulder, Sky seemed to carry a burden far heavier than Jude had ever imagined. Jude felt frozen in place, unable to breathe, move, or even think clearly. The silence between them was deafening despite the storm raging around them. Sky’s uneven breaths brushed against the sensitive skin of his neck. After a few moments, Sky finally pulled away. Jude should have felt relieved, yet a part of him wished Sky had stayed. He was not ready to face those piercing eyes—eyes that, despite all the years they had known each other, he still had not memorized.

Sky gently turned Jude around to face him. Jude offered no resistance. He simply followed Sky’s lead, too stunned to do anything else. Sky seemed unable to meet his eyes. A minute trace of shyness flickered across Sky’s face as his gaze wandered around Jude’s face. But eventually, he gathered his courage and looked directly into his gray eyes.

The intensity in his eyes left Jude at a loss. There was something there, something raw and profound that his heart recognized, but his mind could not name. Normally, Jude would have looked away first, intimidated by the weight of Sky’s stare. But somehow, he found himself holding his ground, refusing to retreat.

What shocked him even more was the sight of tears sliding down Sky’s cheeks. It did not have to be like this. Jude wished he were not serious. He wished it was only droplets of rainfall. But it was not. And it was his very first time seeing him cry.

“And I’m willing to sacrifice my life for you. I’m willing to climb mountains to reach your hands. I’m willing to go to war just to win you. I’m willing to take the bullets for you. I’m willing to die for you. I will go wherever you go, even if you hate me, even if you always avoided me, even if you don’t like me very much, even if you always push me—I’ll keep finding my way back to you because you are my home. You are my home, Jude Finn. You always have been,” he said hoarsely, in his typical Southern accent.

The words were spoken with complete sincerity, his voice low and trembling. There was no trace of a threat, no hint of a command, none of the arrogance or confidence Sky usually carried. Instead, it sounded like a plea.

“Just…just give me a chance to make everything right,” he sobbed.

Jude remained rooted to the spot, unable to move. No coherent thought could form inside his mind. Everything had gone completely blank. The world had truly stopped spinning. The only thing he could see was Sky’s golden eyes locked onto his own. Eyes brimming with a vulnerability and affection that Jude could not quite fathom, much less accept. Despite his confusion, he could see the sincerity in them. He could feel it.

That was what made everything so unbelievable. It all felt too unreal, as if he had somehow fallen into a dream. Part of him desperately wished that he were dreaming. But this was not a dream.

This was real.

And because it was real, he had to reject it.

Jude did not know what came to mind when he took a step forward without breaking eye contact. Maybe because of the chaotic emotions he had felt.

Jude simply did not know.

Jude tiptoed and wrapped his arms around Sky’s neck so he could lean down. He crashed his lips against Sky’s familiar taste. Sky immediately stiffened in surprise. Jude could feel it. He knew Sky had not expected this, just as he had not expected it from himself.

Jude devoured his lips—biting, nibbling, and sucking his upper and lower flesh with aloof intimacy. Sky did not do anything.