Page 47 of His Untoward Hate

Jude bit his upper lip in surrender.

“Fuck!” Sky let out a frustrated curse before abruptly pushing himself to his feet.

Sky planted both hands on his hips in defeat.

“Put that shirt back on and go home,” he said flatly, pointing at the shirt without taking his eyes off Jude. “You can have it, but if you don’t want that damn shirt, you can throw it away,” he uttered the words in a strangely unfamiliar voice before turning his back on him and walking toward the staircase.

“You bring that laptop to your house, and you can borrow it until you want. Keep it and return it to me after our final defense,” he continued. “It’s only because I don’t want to spend time with you anymore, and I know that damn useless thesis has a lot of process, and I know that you will just bother me from time to time to borrow that fucking thing. So better if you just keep it until the day after our oral defense. Now, go home and don’t ever try to think I’ll send you home,” he incessantly said those words without even looking at bewildered Jude Finn.

With that, he left Jude and went upstairs.

Jude was totally dumbfounded.

The thought of Sky taking him home had never even crossed his mind in the first place.

20

Jude kept himself occupied as he walked home through the dusk, every step sending pain coursing through his body. He was already running low on allowance, and taking a taxi or booking an Uber would cost too much. The bus stop was still far from the highway terminal, and he needed to save whatever little money he had left for the rest of the month. For the next few weeks, he would have to depend on the school bus as his main means of transportation, something he often took advantage of anyway.

The night was not even that late yet. In fact, it was only a quarter to nine. Jude still had not finished his research requirements due this week because Sky shooed him away. After all, everyone knew he was not exactly a gentleman.

Jude lowered his gaze to the bandages wrapped around his arms, bringing him to a pit of realization that Sky somehow had that kind of gesture hidden throughout the years. Up until now, it was all surreal and absurd what Sky had done—saving him from those bullies in the parking lot, letting him go to his house, letting him borrow his laptop, letting him wear his shirt, and even treating his wounds.

It happened in one night, and none of it felt believable.

But again, no matter how badly he wanted to see the goodness in him, it still could not erase the wounds he had carved into his heart over the years.

Snapping out of his thoughts, Jude brushed his hands over his biceps as the cold breeze touched his bare skin. He was no longer in his long sleeves, which were already stained with blood and dirt. Instead, he was wearing the oversized black shirt Sky had given him. He planned to throw it away once he got home.

A sense of relief washed over him the moment his house finally came into view. The walk had been long and exhausting, but he tried to see it positively, treating it as a form of exercise instead.

Jude could not wait to lie down on his bed. It was old and far from luxurious, unlike Mitch’s, but he loved the sense of comfort it gave him. His bed had been his comfort and haven all his life. A part of him also longed for that substance he kept hidden in his small drawer, alongside his medications.

Jude wanted to forget this night, this entire day, in general, really. Too many things had happened, leaving him drained and hurting, and all he wanted was an escape. Just for one night, he wanted to lose himself far away from reality again.

Jude could not think of any other option except giving in to the temptation of using the drugs he had hidden away, something he realized he had been relying on constantly these past few months. His dependence on them had started to feel like therapy to him, even if he knew it really was not.

The neighborhood was quiet and peaceful, wrapped in a calm serenity. Only the occasional chirping of crickets and croaking of frogs echoed through the area, though Jude could hardly tell whether they were nearby or somewhere far off.

Tiny pebbles crunched softly against his black school shoes as he trotted, curiosity rising within him when he noticed their house glowing brightly with lights from inside. The moment he stepped onto the short staircase leading to the entrance, familiar voices drifted into his ears.

They belonged to his parents and Mitch.

That was when he remembered that it was Monday. Which also meant his parents had finally returned from their trip. Unsure of what he felt, he stopped in his tracks and listened to their lively chatter wafting through the air. They sounded happy, warmly catching up with one another.

“Mom, I seriously have so many things to tell you! I’m really excited to share everything with you.” Mitch said enthusiastically, her voice filled with excitement. “Can you sleep in my room tonight?”

“Your mom’s still tired from traveling, sweetheart. Why don’t—” Francisco started, only to be interrupted by Elvie.

“Honey, it’s okay,” Elvie assured him gently before turning to Mitch with a smile. “I don’t mind at all, sweetheart. I missed you so much, too. Maybe we can have a girls’ night in your room tonight.”

They had always been really close.

“That’s great, Mom! I seriously have so many things to tell you about.”

From the clinking of cutlery, Jude could tell they were having dinner. Carefully, he placed his black shoulder bag on the floor, which contained Sky’s laptop along with a few random school supplies. He slumped against the wall, his body slowly giving in to exhaustion as he slid onto the wooden floor beside the shut front door. His eyes wandered until they settled on the lamppost across the road, its flickering light the only thing breaking the stillness of the night.

Jude should have felt happy that his parents were finally home. But why didn’t I feel any of that at all?